curious ...I know a girl who dad is half Italian and irish and her mom is irish as well....?

Sounds like your friend is more lacking in knowledge, than in self confidence.

She calls herself Jewish because her DAUGHTER'S FATHER IS?? Well.. she could convert, if she chooses. Since she seems to not understand that she is as much as part of her mother, as she is of her father.. she isn't working with logic to begin with.

Mind bender is accurate, in terms of nationality being the country where you are born/ citizen. Someone of Japanese heritage who is born in Canada is legitimately Canadian. The ethnic background is Asian.

All of the terms.. nationality, heritage, ethnic, cultural, etc have distinct definitions, and can overlap. And it is not rare for someone to confuse the terms, or even ignore them, and grab what they want. You have heard of Wannabes, right?

I don't think you are going to convince your friend of anything.

First off, your nationality is the country of which you are a citizen - no matter where you or your family may have come from. I'm assuming you meant ethnicity vice nationality.

Why would you think she or anyone else is ashamed of anything. So she wants to be 100% Italian....which could be a very valid statement because ethnicity is actually...

Pertaining to a group of people recognized as a class on the basis of certain distinctive characteristics such as religion, culture, language and ethnicity.

Maybe she identifies culturally with Italians more than Irish...OK.

My ancestors came from many different places, but I consider myself 100% American. That doesn't mean I'm ashamed of any place my ancestors may come from - or of any of my ancestors.

So yes I consider myself 100% American - but you know what? I also consider myself 100% Jewish. And I'm not ashamed of anything nor in most things (fixing plumbing problems is the exception because of rather disasterous past results), lacking any self confidence!

I wouldn't say this is a self-confidence issue; nor is it a relection of ignorance on the part of your friends. On the contrary, it sounds like they are just exploring ways of identifying and expressing aspects of themselves.

They consider you to be their friend, not a statistician or cultural anthropologist, so they feel comfortable in expressing themselves in this way when you're around.

For example, the wrapping paper thing isn't a hostile gesture (one can only hope) on the part of her family, just an acknowledgment of her interests, and, possibly, of her daughter's heritage. Purchasing Hannukah giftwrap or appreciating klezmer music does not require a Rabbinic dispensation or even circumcision, for that matter.

I'm sure countless couples who enjoyed a Paris honeymoon bought berets and plastic Eiffel towers, listen to Edith Piaf, learn French on tape, etc. etc. to bring back good memories and make life fun. Everyone gets to wear "kiss me, I'm Irish" shirts on St. Paddy's Day.

Your friends may have reasons to feel they have an Italian or Jewish "heart," so to speak, at least for the time being. No harm or deception being done here!

Your friends just might have a sense of humor or they just identify with certain ethnicities.

However, a person's nationality can only be one thing, unless they have dual citizenship.

I had ancestors in this country before the Mayflower. The settlement at Jamestown Virginia was before the settlement at Plymouth Rock. At least one ancestor was on the 2nd supply to Jamestown in 1608. Also some of my ancestors it is said crossed an ice bridge from East Asia thousandrs of years ago and were here to greet all the newcomers, Vikings, English, French and Spanish, and even St. Brendan.

Still if a person receives naturallization in the U.S. today, their nationality is just as American as mine is.

Now in my ethnic makeup, I am a Pedigree American Mutt.

I think she's proud of the Italian side of her family more than any other. It also depends on the type of people she lives around. If they're mainly Italians, she will find the need to try and be more Italian. It's not that she lacks confidence, but self pride. I don't know where your friend lives, but if she lives in the kind of place I do, you will always see Italians wearing shirts that say Italia, and showing their pride so much. I wear the shirts and all but I don't over do it. But overall she should be proud of herself and what she is, she can never change that so embrace it.

The Italian friend is odd, but being Jewish has nothing to do with your nationality; you can be 100% Jewish and still be 100% German or Russian or French or whatever - it has nothing to do with your nationality.