Why do guys do this?

sounds like it's the whole "being wanted" thing he likes. he'll tell you whatever you want to hear so that you'll fall for him all over again and once he sees you want him, he's not interested anymore. kind of like a really messed up version of playing hard to get.

First mama, I can tell that you are very hurt from your wordy ability here. Being a guy, allow me to answer with no penalty. The guy dated you for 4 years and may have even loved you at one time. Don't believe that he is now with what he did to you. Somewhere along the line though, something happened where the relationship between you too was not enough for him. He is still a jerk, but he either got bored with you guy's routine, maybe you've changed, or maybe he just saw someone who he could take better advantage of. Don't forget that we sometimes think with the brain that gives two signs: Straight for 'Yes' and limp for 'No'.

lol- i had a guy do this. He may be wanting to have you on the side. I bet his girlfriend has no idea that he even spoke to you? And he's going to keep it that way. Don't fall for it- you need to get this guy off your mind. The way that my relationship ended with the guy that kept me on the side? I met one of his other girlfriends and we both confronted him at his apartment but he didn't come out to talk to us because he was too busy having sex with his other girlfriend. Turns out, he had 4 other girlfriends besides me. He used me for money and sex for awhile after that, until i finally put a stop to it. He claimed he loved me the whole time though.

My point being, if this guy had the gall to get up and leave a relationship with you, then he doesn't love you. You don't leave someone you love and start dating someone else and then claim to still love the person you purposely left. I would tell that guy, "Well, you left a good thing, and now you're going to have to live with your decision." leave it at that. It's his fault that he left. Yes, you may still have feelings for him, but he'll just continue to hurt you.

Sarah,

I am a guy and I think you are lucky to find out before you got any deeper with him. Men or women, we are all human and sometimes are indecisive about other people. When he said he loved you, we assume he meant it, but now this new person came along and she may fit his idea of a 'ideal' person more closely. This has nothing to do with your qualities as a human being.

Now the ball is in your court whether you can let go of this person. The world is full of good and bad people. You can find someone else and not be hung up by the past.

Unfortunately they do it because they can. There is no good reason so don't worry yourself trying to figure it out. when a guy does something like that the best thing is to cut him off completely. Men are so predictable I knew the end of the story before you finished. In the future don't put all your eggs in one basket. Men don't and he's doing just fine while you are hurting see how that works out. He's the type to drain a woman until she has nothing left. Thats the best I can come up with.

well I'm sry thing happened to u! and guys are pretty big asses! but u have to look at it this way if he was really urs, its better that u let go and if he really does come back not just for a night b/c him and his girlfriend prolly got into a fight but for a good long time the he was always urs

but u have to think guys say what ever they can to get a girl in the bed so u have to think about what he said did he REALLY mean it or did he just say it to have a lil fun w/ u...

I'm sorry thing happened to u and i hope everything works out!

well the only reason i could think he would do this is after a while no offense guys just get kind of bored. It;s happend to me a couple of times and when guys minds wander and think of other things they act before they think of what they really want. My honest opinion is don't believe him if hes done that once hell do it again no matter how hard it is you have to move on and find someone else. I hope this helps you good luck =)

Because he obviously still has some sort of feelings for the girl he's currently with and doesn't know who or what he wants, so you've been designated as his fallback safety net.

Boys are so fickle, are you sure you want to play second fiddle?

he's testing to see if he does break up with this other girl you'll be waiting. DONT WAIT FOR HIM. do you want to be his plan B. by the way what a f*ckhead would you really want to be with a guy like this

She's probably not giving him sex and he knows you will....He's a lying, cheating filthy pig. Do not fall for his BS...you will only be hurt again in the end..Men are dogs and they deserve to be kicked in the balls when they cheat. Bitter, party of 1....seriously...move on and forget about him.