We have my brother in law living with us ( he is 53 years with Down Syndrome )?

If you and your husband are doing all that is necessary to care for your special needs family member, then you should be the CUSTODIAL guardians. Period! Next time the other brother brags, ask for specifics of what he does. Confront him on this issue!

My daughter and her husband have guardianship and total responsibility for my son-in-law's adult special needs brother and sister. Their parents live 18 miles away and do nothing and they are never asked for help. My daughter's family includes these two in every way in their family and are willing and capable of providing all their needs, both physical and emotional. They would confront anyone who made such boasts in a heartbeat!!!

are you just venting as I see no question as the big sister of a man with mental retardation i know how you feel and believe me you are a better person for what you are doing kudos to you, it stakes a strong and loving heart to take on this responsibility a responsibility that i know will be mine when my mother can no longer do it, as hard as it will be hes my brother and i know no one will give him the care i can once my mother is unable.....God has chosen you to do something special and in the end you will be rewarded, if they don't want to help to bad for them, there are government programs like respite care were people will come in several hours a week and be with him activities and such so you can have a break, i don't know what state you are in to give you information but there is lots of stuff out there to help.

You can contact DDSD, the Department of Delvelopmental Disabilities in your state as well at the ARC, an advocacy group for people with developmental disabilities. Your borther in law is entitled to services but someone has to get them for him. You can also get paid as your brother in law's aide through an agency for services you render. Check into it and see if the guardianship can be changed.

have a stern word with the other brothers & say you need them to help you both out.

You better talk to your husband about this.

tell your husbend step up if he wants to stay with you then he better do something you are not his servents and if he didntlike this then kick him out you are not marring him you are marrieng you are marring his brothe and he is too old to stay and do nothing