when do you know it's time to get out?

I think it's only fair to give children two happy parents living separately instead of two miserable ones living together.

I've been married almost 3 years and we're hitting a tough spot. I think about leaving but I dosen't feel right. When I was just datiing people it was easy to know when to call it quits. You just feel different towards the person or maybe your love just grows cold. But when you're married you have to try to blend and work together. It's really hard sometimes and alot of people give up....I'd say it's worth it to stay for the kids as long as you guys aren't tearing eachother down all the time. Alot of people will say it's better to leave for the kids sake, I guess it just depends how much you can take before you give up.

When you have DONE EVERYTHING that is humanly possible to make it work. You took vows and you are obligated to keep those vows unless it is just totally impossible.

This includes, but isn't limited to, counseling (together and seperate), talking to s/one at your church, getting on antidepressents if nessesary, going on date nights, reminding our self why you feel in love and were happy with this person in the first place. There is SO much to do to keep the marriage together. And you say you have kids, how old? If they are young, have you thought that maybe the changes that have happened to your life and your spouse's life since you had the kids may have s/thing to do with your unhappiness?

And, if after you have tried everything you can and it still isn't working, don't stay just for the kids. They will be much happier in the long run if the two of you don't stay together and fight the rest of their lives!!

You will know it when you can't take it no more. If the two of you are not happy than your children already know it whether you try to hide it or not. The relationship pattern you are showing them is what they will grow up to think is acceptable.

I think everyone should put forth their best effort to save their marriage, especially since you have children. Talk to your spouse and see if he thinks he can put forth more effort also, figure out your problems and work together to try and solve them. You can't always sweep your troubles under the rug to keep the kids from knowing what is going on. Sometimes you got to shake the rug, even if you have to hire a sitter to do it.

Depends on the situation. For example, mom is an alcoholic. Should dad leave to make things better for himself or stay to make sure things don't get worse for the kids? Obviously, he needs to stay so things won't get worse for his kids. If you are just unhappy and there is no abuse or lots of loud fighting going on, maybe you should stay until the kids are of age. It's always better to have two parents (as long as there is no abuse, etc.) rather than one if at all possible.

These people who say the "kids are smart", and to not stay together for them are dead wrong. When you committed to marriage and then had kids, you and your spouse gave their lives over to marriage and raising your kids. You MUST STAY and you need to fake it. In front of your kids you pretend that you are happy as can be. If you need to take a weekend every now and then to get away, go for it. Do not run away from your kids, and don't try to take away their father.

My mother stayed for us, she was so unhappy. As kids, we saw, we heard and we were scared. But, we didn't know any different.

By the time I was about 11, I understood more and I wanted out, but didn't tell me mum, I wish she would have asked us.

5 years later we all left our dad, the happiest day of our lives.

Over 30 years later I still remember how mean and nasty everything was.

No don't stay cause of your kids cause you might just hurt your kids more than each other. And the time to get out of that relationship is NOW, if your not happy why stick around?!

Don't stay for the kids. They are smart. They don't want to be around mom and dad fighting all the time. When both parents are happy, they are happy.

staying together is worth it for the kids sake...I feel you, I feel like that have the time its like a never ending roller coaster ride..sometimes we have to sacrifice are happiness for the kids sake , maybe once they get older we can move on...hard to say..best wishes