LDS (girls) - do you feel pressured to get married? Are there any single LDS girls here over 25 years old? 30?

I was 26 when I got married. My husband 29. I had always had the goal to get married around 25, I wanted to finish my education, travel to Europe, start a career, etc., so I didn't stress out about things so much until that Birthday came and went, and I started reflecting on the fact that I had never had a boyfriend. On top of that my recently returned from a mission brother got engaged, and my little sister got engaged. Than I started pressuring myself. My parents became more desperate and pressured my siblings into setting me up, it miraculously worked? Living with singles since I was 18 it became quite obvious that the older men were interested in younger girls. After I graduated from college (21), and lived with younger girls they were often married and dated before any of my roommates who were closer in age to the young man, this would drive me crazy. I still have many girlfriends who are not married and are now over the age of 30. The honest truth is that even though advances in science have made it easier to conceive after the age of 27 your chances of conceiving become more difficult. Most Relief Society lessons focus on raising a good family. Many might deny the pressure, but I know growing up when a family had a child that was not married over the age of 25 there was quiet talk, about why they hadn't been able to find a mate (they were to shy, not attractive, to involved with career,) I was told many times I was intimidating because of my education. Now as a person who did get married "older" than the norm, I find that I feel always fit in because I am older just starting my family, many that are younger than me have eight year olds, and some from H.S. already have kids going into Jr. High. I find myself trying to hangout with women with children my kids age who I could have taught in H.S. I don't necessarily want to trade my experiences for that, and I am very grateful to have my 3 year old and one on the way. I feel sorry for my friends who are single that is the truth, not all of them are secure in that world, and yearn desperately for my world. A lot of my friends were called as RS presidents in singles wards when they were 29 years old, this was the case for three of my friends. I don't know if it was a your the oldest you get it, or a last ditch effort on their behalves to get them noticed?

I have met some very successful single women who would make perfect spouses and mothers, and I wonder what kind of crazy guy let this person go? But, they always say Sheri Dew did it, and so can I. I heard that so many times, and it's the truth.

I am LDS but am not over 25, however I do go to BYU so everyone around here is always getting married. I would say that lots of people around here feel pressure to get married because all of their friends, co-workers, etc are all getting married before them so they think that there must be something wrong with them. I, however, do not feel pressured because I know that whatever happens happens and rushing things isn't going to make things better. I don't think we get extra callings or assignments because we're single...in fact, i think we are actually really busy so that wouldn't make sense at all.

I think being single is fun, it's a time in my life to enjoy so I don't worry about the future too much. I am as I mentioned not over 25 though so who knows what I'll be thinking by then...:) hope this helped.

I left the church shortly before I turned 19.

As soon as I turned 18, the pushing started. I had an interview with my Bishop about marriage, and how it was important that I started looking. They transfered me to the singles ward right away. I was constantly being set up, even so far as people making bets on how long it would take me to get married (I guess you could say I;m fairly attractive). If my parents had missionaries over for dinner, jokes were cracked about them coming back to marry me.

My Dad had even talked to me about being married before I turned 19. I hadn't even MET anyone yet!

Not long after, I QUIT!! The pushing was the main factor at first. But, followed by a lot more and making me very firm in my decision. My family in fact did the same about a year later.

Now, I have been dating my boyfriend of 2 and a half years, we live together, and are in the process of buying a house. My parents are now the last ones to push us towards marraige.

I'm 41 and will be sealed to my fiance in the temple in July. He's 41, too.

Yes, unfortunately, it's not the church or its doctrine, but I have to be honest and say that, due to the culture, I have felt a little isolated and "different," to the point that I have addressed this to people at church. I guess I was having a "moment." I was not sounding bitter, I hope, but stating that I did feel a little. . .I don't know. . .because I am not 20 or 30, but 40, and I guess for a single woman, life is "over" at 40 and you might as well take yourself off the market. . .having people feel sorry for me (why?). . .but then I feel lucky because I have experienced a lot more in life than having babies (not that this is bad, I really want one now!) and I have traveled the world. Looking back, I think that this was the best life for myself and that my life went just as it should have.

There was an ensign that came out last year that really comforted me, as it addressed singles. Thank goodness for that--unfortunately, I forgot what month it was. And I have cancelled my subscription as I am moving soon to be with my new spouse. But please check into that because reading it will help comfort you, too.

nobody looks down on you for not being married. I think those women just feel left out when they see all their friends starting their families and they're still single.

The church has always told us that marriage is a big decision, and if the wrong man asks you to marry him say no. Sometimes the right man will never come a long and you just get married and sealed in the next life.

I'm pretty sure they don't give you a time consuming calling just because you're single. We know that sometimes single women are busier than a stay at home mom.

I was a single member to the age of 25 and from a family predominately LDS and have never felt much pressure from anyone to marry, only to choose carefully when considering it. I have seen civil marriages and temple marriages alike crumble to pieces under the pressure of daily life after the wedding was over. Some lasting a couple decades, some several years and others no more than a couple of months. There is no perfect marriage, civil or temple. It is all in choice and how we work it out with the one we choose.

Did I ever feel like I was looked down on? Of course it is human nature to feel singled out, but it took awhile to see I was.Just not in the way I had thought, My Heavenly Father looked down on me and could single me out of any crowd, he knew my strongest points as well as my weakest ones and loved me anyway. And when I realized that insecurity lied with me and not with others that was when I began to grow.

And as for the callings, I've never known anyone to have more than one at a time, but have felt more overwhelmed with them now that I have children than I ever did as a single member. And quite honestly having seen both sides of the fence, it's much harder to be a nursing mother trying to hush a baby while teaching a class that happened to fall in on a feeding time. Single... you have time it is just to your self, married or a mother you have the same amount of time you just give it to everyone else.

Callings are not there to punish you but, there to bless you. And if you can't see that then your just looking in the wrong place for answers.

Well I am not a chick, but I am a single LDS guy. Yeah we are encouraged to get married, but most of the pressure on me came from myself. It wasn't until recently that I realized my pursuit in thinking I better hurry and get married was the cause of my unhappiness. It will happen when it happens. I live right and I want to enjoy life more. And I am 30, and quite a catch from what my mother says...and everyone else too.

When I was a mormon, most of the girls I new were at least already married by the time their return missionary came home. I went thru 2 return missionaries before i started to loose faith. Then I did alot of work for the baptism for the dead, that is I worked hours and hours trying to interpret the microfilm so I could give names to the church for the baptism for the dead, even got a cetificate, but then I still was not finding any man to marry, it seemed I was going to be a spinster, when I decided to go on a missions trip, my dad was against it, by then I had had enough of the church and had joined the army, getting out of UT was my undoing, because getting out in the world and getting new ideas into my head made me realize that I really didn;t believe in the church and if I did, then the new ideas wouldn't have mattered, my Dad was drafted and he went out into the world and the world never changed Him, his testimony was as strong as ever, but me...nope, I found the freedom I had always been looking for.

I just thought it was interesting that you picked 25. That's how old my wife and I both were when we got married. I attended a Single's ward before I was married. I didn't really feel much pressure to get married as much as to date. And usually it was the girls who were doing the pressuring, not the leadership. Of course, that was just my experience, and although the "church" may be the same around the world, the culture isnt always the same.

I'm not LDS, so my answer probably doesn't count, but I think society in general puts a lot of pressure on women to get married. It's like, if you're not married, then something must be wrong with you.