Ladies I need a little advice...Mature Adults Only Please,Thanks?

First I am so sorry for your heart! As women(most of us) we are very naturing and emotional creature when(most men) are very pactical creatures and what makes us tick does not make them1 Disprespect is universe and sould never be tolerate! You all need to talk! You need to find out why he feels they way he does and I know its easily said than done!! You need a good cry you have been crush! Try to talk to him and see if you all can get some counseling! but when you all talk try to separate your feelings from what he is saying sometime women(most of us) can get so emotional and we lose focus and when we get to emotional (most men) shut down!

It sure sounds like you love him and you want it to work out. Does he still wear his wedding ring? Is he disrespectful only in public?How does he act weird,in public? Try to figure out when things are taking place and how often, even if you have to keep a private journal tucked away somewhere. Things just might add up in front of your eyes. Do you have a hobby or a special interest? Start doing something for yourself instead of focusing on the negetive in front of you. Join a health club, better yourself physically and mentally. Don't let him see you moping around "because of him". Let him see that you are still carrying on with your life. Play happy music when you are cleaning house or making dinner (happy music to me are songs that energize me and put a smile on my face). Rent some comedy movies and watch them when you are feeling down. You can borrow movies from the library and they have tons to choose from with pretty much up to date movies. You know the saying "don't let them see you sweat", well "don't let him see you down". Then you won't give him the power to make you fall apart. If you need to get away for a good cry, go see a friend or go to the movies. As far as intimacy, it just might not be there any more, but only time will tell, remember the journal?

He "doesn't think he can handle" what? You might want to start by reminding him of the vows you made on your wedding day. I think it's so lame when people want a divorce just because they're "not as happy as they used to be." Or because someone isn't exactly the same they were a few years ago. So, unless there's something else going on that's not being mentioned here, he's pretty lame. That being said, you can't make your husband stay married to you if he doesn't want to be. Right now, you need to take care of yourself. Get some counseling so you're better prepared to deal with this.

Sounds like he's trying to give you fair warning that something has changed for him, and obviously, has changed him. Just tell him how you feel, what you've noticed, and ask him to do the same. See if you guys can work it out or at least, find out if it is worth working out. Sometimes, things change and people have to change too. Would you prefer for him to be happy elsewhere and frustrated in a marriage, or, both being happy apart, or at least happy knowing whats at stake. Put all of the cards on the table, give each other the respect to choose. I wouldnt jump to a conclusion that he is cheating, however, I wouldnt be shocked if he has been attracted to someone else or thought about being with someone else THERE is a BIG difference.

so, open your mind, mouth, and heart, and just be ready. Save yourself some pain and misery, sounds like you are beating yourself up in the dark!

Sorry that you are hurting right now that sucks!!! Nobody tells you that marriage is really hard!! It is alot of work that both of you have to keep up ! Marriage is like any relationship with ups and downs, however when it gets to the point where you both are hurting some action needs to take place,,, there are some options: counseling,,, trial seperation, a long overdue vacation as a last ditch attempt to make amends!!! Hope this helps, Goos Luck !!!

I know this must be hard for you. He says he is not sure he wants to be married anymore. Instead of resisting, give him the out and tell him to go ahead and leave, tell him you are not sure you want to be married either (the way he is treating you?). Do not say it in an angry tone or cry and yell, say it a normal tone of voice. You will find out quickly if this is a phase (a down cycle), a space issue or if indeed there is someone else.

It really sounds like he may be cheating on you, sorry to tell you that.

Ask him if he is willing to seek marriage counseling? Also ask him when he stopped wanting to be married? What happened to change his mind about being married or is it you that he does not want to be married to?

He can't possibly love you as a husband should love his wife and in the next breath tell you that he no longer wants to be married, unless he is in fact having an affair and he is trying to let you down gently.

Best of Luck

I'm not trying to hurt you here; I'm going to be very honest. My gut reaction to this (and I'm speaking from personal experience) is that he's picking fights w/you b/c he feels guilty b/c he's cheating or has someone else he's interested in that he wants to be with and is looking for you to perform the final break so he gets off the hook.

My suggestion, before you throw in the towel, is to suggest marriage counseling (if you want to try and save your marriage) to him. If he's for it, then possibly there's something there worth saving... if not, then I'm sorry to say, he may have already moved beyond the two of you on his side of things.

If he's not interested in counseling, then do it for yourself. You'd be surprised how helpful it can be at getting you through this emotional time.

I wish you the best of luck.

Yeah, I was in that situation also. Hold old is he? Can it be a midlife crisis? My ex husband had affairs and I was the last one to found out. I hope for your sake it's not that.

It's maybe best not to pressure him at his moment - it will only push him away more. Try your best to see the situation in a positive way. Don't you have any friends that you can talk to? Maybe you need to go away for awhile just to get some new perspective.

Good luck

I'm sure you are a beautiful person don't let this man make you miserable i have a tough time with mine alot and i still stick in there??? but if he is telling you this there is something he might be hiding if you know the lord pray about it and things will turn out the best for you whether it be with or without him hang in there