i havent been a parent to my kids in 10 yrs. we live in 2 different and i want htem to come live with me.?

You need to talk to their grandmother about this first and foremost. Secondly, if she agrees, SLOWLY reintroduce a relationship with your children. You haven't been in their life for a long time. Do not expect them to immediately accept you. If they are open to starting a relationship move slowly and let them take the lead. They will let you know if they want you back on a more permanent basis. If it looks like it's heading in that direction, be prepared to move back where they are.

It sounds like after ten years they have made a life for themselves. And now you want to just show up and say mommy is alive come live with me? That is not going to work. First, does the grandmother know you are alive? Do the kids think you are dead? Have you had any contact with them at all during the past ten years? I think what you need to do, is talk with a professional because we on here could give you advice but not what you need. If you are planning on getting back in their lives, you need to talk with someone with some type of background in this who can give you the best suggestions on how to do this without damaging/hurting your children before you make any moves. I don't think you are going to be able to force them to go live with you as they have lives and friends where they are but one day, you may be able to be a part of their lives.

Also, you need to consider things before you do this. Are you ready to invest a lot of time into building a relationship with them? It will not come easy and may take months maybe even years before they are comfortable with you. If you are going to keep dodging in and out, you should probably leave them be. But again, this is something you should talk to a professional about so that you receive the best information on not only how to handle this but what to expect in the coming months.

It really depends on how much a part of their lives that you have been over the past ten years. Do they know you? Do they know that living with Grandma was supposed to be "temporary"? I know from experience that trying to get your kids back from a grandparent after they have been living with them for an extended time can be VERY difficult and very costly. It has been a long time, I think that you should go slowly unless they are used to the idea, it could hurt them more than you know

No. Your children want a relationship with their parent regardless of what they've been through. My parents could do anything to me and I would love them the same. Fortunately though, I had great parents. You should ease in very slowly. They shouldn't live with you right away, they don't even know you and should not be forced out of their comfort zone. Just accept your faults and learn to live with this relationship from a distance. As your children get older they can make that decision for themselves. But chances are they may want to stay where they are. And you can't blame them. Leave them there, but try to have a relationship.

If you decide to remove the children, you will probably have a fight on your hands and most likely loose..

Best for the children after 10 years to leave them where they are, you should be paying child support and visiting with your children.

These children do not know you since you say that it has been 10 years...

Do what is in the best interest for the children not what is best for you.

Glad to hear that you are getting your life together...