Death of a loved one and the importance of justice as a healing tool?

Losing a loved one hurts, no doubt. I think it's interesting though -- psychologists have done studies of families of murder victims, and the families tend to say that they want the murderer to get the death penalty, and they want to be there to watch. They truly believe that it will make the feel better and heal the pain. But, AFTER they have watched the execution, they don't actually feel better at all and often feel even worse. I think it's just so painful to lose a loved one that NOTHING will make it go away except lots and lots of time. I guess we think that an eye for an eye will make us feel better, but it doesn't really.

speaking from experiance as i have lost a child, the initial reaction is to blame someone, i think it is a natural reaction not only to justify your loss but also the minds way of searching for a way of undoing the damage. which of course wont happen but with such traumatic loss it is natural to not believe what has happened. you then blame yourself.

people think finding that reason will bring closure even revenge , for instance the driver of the boat who didnt do

anything wrong was still in control of that boat and therefore took the childs life, this for a parent is the only way to cope with the greiving and maybe they think they will feel better if a punishment for their childs death could be brought, i am probably waffling ,all i know for sure is losing a child is the single most painfull traumatic heart smashing thing that can happen to a mother or father, the range of emotions are immense, denial , anger, dibeleif, rage, fear, self pity, and many more. sorry if ths didnt make sense, but it is so difficult to put into words.

the pain of my loss has ever gone away, it has been 7 years, time doesnt heal it, it only helps you to cope better with it

I think in many cases it gives the family some sort of closure for an incident such as that.Perhaps also, the thought that the death of your loved one means that other lives will not be at risk in the same way in future, gives the feeling of purpose to the loved one's life.

Using Justice system is not to heal your self. It is to make sure that this sort of things does not happen to anyone else. Well, I feel sorry for that family but there is nothing you can do about it you know, unless THEY step up and bring that person to justice four community's good.

People now tend to look to blame something or someone for what has happened in their lives,and will go to extraordinary lengths to get a result in which they can find comfort.

i thought it was a case of bringing the perpatrator to justice