My daughter, who I love very much, is a meth user. She is married to an exconvict, they have two children.?

You say your daughter is an enabler but yet she feels she has a right to sell their birthday presents??? Come on!!!

I dont mean to sound nasty, but a drug addict sorry to say, that is what she is, can not be an "enabler" as you put it because the drug is controlling her.

I was pretty much in the same situation and I can only share my experience. My sons father and I when we just met also were hooked on drugs and I fell pregnant in that time. I stopped taking drugs as I didn't want to harm my baby. He on the otherhand wouldn't stop. He also use to steal his mom's stuff as he was still staying with his mom, had no job and was also an ex-convict. I ended up leaving him when my son was about 8months old. I was clean at the time. Anyway I had to raise my son on my own and took alot of strain as I did not have people/family supporting me. I started taking drugs again. I wasn't selling anything, as I didn't have anything to sell but the one year close to my sons birthday I had saved all this money for a nice birhday party, I ended up using it the night before his birthday. There is no way I can explain or even try and justify that kind of behaviour. It is selfish, childish and irresponsible. But I must add that when you are hooked to a drug you are no longer in control of your body and mind in situations where you crave so much you think you'll die if you dont get it. I lost control of who I was so how could I even try controlling a certain situation. My mom had enough at that point and took my son to go and stay with her, as I was an addict but also very unstable at the time, I'd like to add though that all addicts are unstable. Anyway my son was then staying with my mom, I was staying with a friend and saw my son maybe once a week, he was 2years old at the time, it took me about three to four months to hit rock bottom as I realised, when I was pregnant I gave up drugs without going to rehab, and I did that for my unborn baby and now that his born and loves and adores me I just throw him away so I can have my little pleassure in taking drugs. My conciouns was killing me slowly and the one morning I woke up, and I just couldn't carry on anymore. I made a decision that I have to stop and if I cant i'll have to end this nighmare some other way even if it meant taking my own life. Good prevailed, THANK GOD!!!! I've been clean since 2003, am married to a wonderful, lazy husband, which I absolutely adore and my son is with me. I dont know your daughters true situation but what helped me stop taking drugs was the fact that I wouldn't have been able to live with myself knowing what I was hurting my son. Maybe your daughter needs a big scare like that too. She might just realize whats important to her. What I must add, and this is important, is that she will not stop unless she wants too. You cant force her to do anything but as grandmother to those innocent kiddies you need to step in and think of them as she is not thinking of them or else she would not be selling there stuff. She is only thinking of her craving for the drug. In fact I bet that she cant stop thinking about it and that it is not just controlling her but her life, and the kids's life too. It wont stop there either. Sooner or later it will destroy anything and everything even her marriage. Her kids will hate as they grow up, to them taking drugs is a sign of weakness. Who wants to look up to a "weak" mother? Not only that what if they also start doing it as they think that kind of behaviour is normal???

Those kids will end up growing up resenting their mother for selling their stuff, for taking away the little pleassures they have in order to have more pleassure for herself.

The fact that the father is putting up with this, tells me that he's not in control of the household and he needs to do that. He is your key to help your daugther and if he wont help you stop her, it means he's either not interested or he's scared to stand up to her or he might be taking meth with her.

Meth is an ugly drug and as far as my knowledge goes a very "hard" drug to just stop by yourself. I was on cocaine and mandrax and ecstacy all at once and I stopped but i have a very strong will power and God was helping me. I dont know your religion but I'm suggesting you pray to God to help and guide you to do the right thing here.

This must be tough, but just keep the faith!!!! Good always prevails over evil and as long as your daughter has you for a mother she'll be fine. Its gonna be tough to stop the drug and its a long and very hard process. I still sit with it today. I have to constantly tell myself that I dont need a drug to cope and that I'm stronger, healthier, more in control and more enabled to take care not just of my kids but my husband and mother too.

Email me if necessary, even if its just to chat. PLease keep me posted on the situation though as I would like to keep praying for her untill she is healthy again...

Good luck

You won't like my response, but too, too, are enabling your daughter by not anonymously calling CPS on that household (assuming you know she's still using).

I'm sure this sounds extreme, but if you're really interested in helping these kids, it's what you have to do. Their dad may be turning his life around, but this isn't enough to counteract a mom on meth. It destroys childhoods.

that's hilarious. my mother and father could in no way opt for it although. I do not particularly consider the 5th paragraph is humorous, however i consider it makes it look extra truly. wowza. Plus if i did not ship letters or name, they could almost always freak out and contact the police. Anyway Dorothy will get 5 stars for her writing skills. Maybe she must important in inventive writing... I woulda positioned this beneath parenting, however its soo humorous it's not relevant. Hahaha. simply reread it. now not as humorous the moment time. Only laughed for 10 mins this time.

You should talk to a family psycologist(sorry about my spelling) and take some steps to make things better for the sake of your children and grandchildren. If things get scary with threats or anything illegal go to the police. But remember you should not feel guilty about going to the cops because you are only trying to make things better for them.

sounds like you need some support/counseling with these hard issues at hand, placing boundaries with addicts is a must, there are family support groups out there that would benefit you very much

uhoh... i would suggest sitting down and telling that you love her and are really worried. if this doesnt work, then try talking to someone who specializes in this stuff