My ex-husband is getting married to a woman he recently got pregnant, How can I feel better about it?

Hang on to your faith. There is life after divorce. I was in your place about 6 years ago. My husband came home from a 2 week National Guard summer camp and told me that he didn't love me anymore and he wanted a divorce. I was stunned! Yes it was very painful. My faith in God, that he would get me through it, was strengthened by the ordeal. I learned to depend on HIm. I found out later that my ex had cheated on me and contracted an STD (which he has never admitted to-but I am a nurse and I got the doctor's bill where he went for treatment.) He was dating someone he met on line before I ever moved out of the house we were buying. He moved her into the same house about 2 months after our divorce was final and they got married 8 months later. He and I had been married for 18 years! Heck yes, it hurt! But he got what was coming to him and all I had to do was sit back and watch it happen. A month after they married, he got called up with the guard unit and spent over a year in Iraq. He and wife #2 separated shortly after he returned and neither of them have the money to file for a divorce. He has had a car repossessed and is about to lose the house to foreclosure. He tried to be a friend to our teen aged sons, instead of their Dad, and now both of them see him for who he really is.

As for me, I spent a lot of time in prayer and asked God to help me find new Christian friends. You might consider joining a church singles group. I did a lot of walking to relieve my stress of going through a divorce and ended up losing 25 pounds and found a new confidence in myself. Plus I felt a lot better physically.

I accepted an invitation to have dinner with a man that I had gone to high school with and occasionally saw around work. On that date, I found out that he had been recently divorced and we talked about how our faith was getting us through it. I suddenly felt like I was hit in the chest with a brick as it dawned on me that here, right in front of me, was what I had asked God for. Of course when I asked for friends, I wasn't even thinking about a man. He and I attended several church activities together and I did make new friends and re-connected with old ones that I had lost touch with. Most of my friends today, are not the same ones I had when I was married. Long story short, the man and I continued to date for the next 5 years and are getting married in 3 weeks. I truly feel that God brought him to me.

Do not give up hope! I truly believe that God gives us bad times in order for us to appreciate the good times when we get them. He does it to make our faith stronger. He does not give us more than we can handle. I had to lean on Him a lot in the first several months after divorce. One of the Bible verses that kept me going was "Sorrow lasts for a night, but joy comes with the morning." And a song that we seemed to sing a lot at church in those first few months :

"I'm trading my sorrows, I'm trading my pain,

I'm laying them down for the joy of the Lord"

If God has brought you to the point of a divorce, He has something SO MUCH BETTER planned for your future.

I wish you peace.

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Ex Husband Getting Married

Hun, you are suffering from hurtful feelings that come from being rejected. A self pity party is good to get it all out there, to cry and let go of the pain. But if taken for too long a time, this self pity can stop you from being happy. Don't do this alone.Get into a support group and therapy. You obviously have emotional pain from having difficulties with having a baby. In your eyes, her being pregnant makes her appear more desirable and his willingness to marry her is just another jab at your already wounded self esteem.. Well you are special in your own way and you have to come to believe this. This is where therapy will help you. I know these feelings you are experiencing can make you feel isolated, as if you are the only one suffering. Just know, most of us have gone through a broken heart, I know I have, thought I would not get over it, and I did.. One day you will be able to look back on all of this and be glad that it ended the way it did. You will find a guy who will love you and who will make you feel the special person that you are, I promise you will. Time will be your best friend and as days, months, years go back, you will know you will feel better. Good luck to you!

If he did it behind your back while you two were already an item, then you can rest assured that he will do it again and again. It is rare to do it once. You are right to worry. In your shoes knowing what I know, I would not have married him at all. To an alcoholic just one drink will change all the effort he might have made for ten years To a cheat just a smile from an ex could change all the months and promises. They cheat because they know nothing about self respect or respect for the spouse and nobody that old can be taught that. If you keep him you got to be on your guard all the time.

Since this man is your ex you need to not be so involved in his life going forward. There is no reason for you to know he is getting married or that his fiance is pregnant. It seems that you are looking for reasons to be upset and not move forward. The past is the past and he is not part of your future so you must move forward.

Your right, he never TOLD you he was unhappy until he wrote you the letter. He kept leading you on until he had his ducks in a row and was ready to leave the marriage. He wrote you a letter so he would not have to deal with the pain and tears of a broken marriage. He was ready to get out long before the letter, thats pobably why he told every day(to reasure you since he was making plans behind your back). You never saw this coming since you were happy, and could do nothing to fix it. What you need to end is your dependancy on him for your happiness. You can find love elsewhere, but you must look for it.

aw I'm sorry you're soo sad. I've been in your position in some respects. My ex and I were in the process of getting a divorce, we have a child together also. He was out cheating on me. His girlfriend found me on my space and told me everything. About how he was trying to get her pregnant (when he didn't even visit or pay child support for the child he already has). I was very upset for a long time. Thats a hard pill to swallow. To think that you once cared about this person and they could do such a thing to you. We all deal with grief in different ways and if this is your way thats ok. It took me about a year to actually accept everything and move on. Don't listen to the other people on here telling you to get over him thats just mean. You need to do this in your own time and you'll know when you're ready to go out again. good luck to you. I hope everything goes well.

Stop dwelling on him and his new life. You both are free to make your own futures. Dont compare them. Concentrate on you.

Find a new guy and that will help you a lot. Maybe join a club. If you like astronomy, join your local astronomical society. There are a whole lot of smart men in these clubs with real jobs and many are single. You are not too old either.

At age 46 my husband and I met on

http://www.plentyoffish.com/

That really worked for us! Dont tell lies on your bio. If you do then you get someone who wants what you are not. Tell the truth and there are no disappointments. I did have to throw back a few fish before I found my keeper, but it was a lot of fun and FREE too. Good luck to you.

Perhaps it will make you feel better knowing he is entering a loveless relationship that is doomed to failure? It sounds like he is only marrying her to make her an honest women thing. That won't last long, and there will be kids involved, so messy divorce, and you will not even be the only person's life he will have made miserable, but also another womean and a kid. Isn't life wonderful?

Seriously, find some things you enjoy doing, and do them. Try not to worry about other people's lives.

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This is probably the most important part. With texting, you can stop and think about what you want to say to your ex at each step of the way. Instead of reacting emotionally, you can take your time, figure out the right thing to say (I’ll give you most of it), and be strategic with your ex without saying something that you’ll regret.