New neighbor calls her kids....how to talk to her?

You can't change her, but you can explain to your kids that it isn't right for them to say it. I would strongly suggest that you DO NOT approach your neighbor about this. That is her manner of speech, it is normal for her -- you can't change her. For that matter, none of us can change anybody, but we can explain to our children that what may be normal for some people is not normal for our family. That way, we all learn the true meaning of diversity.

I would encourage you to pull her aside when the kids are not around and ask her if you could talk for a minute. Start by saying something like, "I'm not trying to push any buttons or step on any toes but I've heard you use a certain word around the kids and I understand you are not saying it to be offensive but I'm concerned my kids might get the wrong impression and start using the word like it's normal." Then ask her if she has an opinion about it and take it from there to find a possible solution. If she begins to get defensive about it, then try your best to keep cool and diffuse the situation by telling her you just wanted to make her aware of your concern. Hopefully you will be able to talk with each other peacefully. good luck.

Okay well this is the dilemma. In all actuality she can call her kids whatever she wants. She can call them little b@#$ches and it's really up to her, it's not a crime and doesn't warrant child welfare intervention. Now its your choice of whether or not you want her around your kids because of this. Honestly I wouldn't want anyone who calls her kids that babysitting my kids. I would limit my interaction with her. Cool or not. If you do decide to confront her I would be really careful about how you address the topic because that's a sensitive topic. She will probably respond with I am black so i can say that.

Well you should talk to her and tell her how you feel, maybe she will understand the situation that you are in If she doesn't understand the only thing you can do is talk to YOUR boys. Sit down with them and explain the word to them and how she can use the word but how they shouldn't. Also explain to them that they are still good people but that you don't want them to be saying the word.

Just have a mature, mom to mom conversation.

Tell her that you don't care what she calls her kids while she's inside, but if she could please not say it outside because your kids can hear it, and you don't perticularly want them to hear this, and have it become a word in their vocabulary. If your kids every hear it, or if they come asking you what it means because they heard the neighbour say it, just have a talk with yours kids and tell them it's not a nice word, and that you NEVER want to hear them say it. You can politley inform her without making it a fight. Good luck, and way to be a good mom! I know people who could care less about their children's enviorment.

The mom to mom conversation won't work, it will just put you in an awkward position with her. You won't be able to change her, you'll just get her irritated with you. Have a talk with your kids and make them understand what the word is and that you don't approve of them using it.

You probably can't change her. Instead, tell your children that some parents call their children names when they aren't supposed to, and that the n-word is still a bad word. Your children are not allowed to call the neighbors or anyone else that word.

Talk to her at the risk of being told to mind your own business. Be sure you talk to your own children and explain to them that it is never right to use the "N" word"