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Kashi
Lv 5
Kashi asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 1 decade ago

How to deal with neighbor girls with aspergers?

My 6 yr. old daughter is having a hard time dealing with the two neighbor girls who have aspergers who are going into second grade. Does anyone have any advice on this? I don't want my daughter to be mean to them, but on the other hand, I don't want her to get walked all over either. The girls play with the other kids nice for just a bit, then when they don't get their way, they stomp off yelling. They'll usually return with a mean drawing or note for the kids that upset them. They also accuse the other kids of calling them names and being mean to them when it hasn't happened. They say that the kids can only be their friends if they do exactly what they want them to do. I find I have to be right by them when they play at our house so I can know exactly what is happening. I have to keep telling them that we don't talk that way at our house, and to not lie to me. My daughter will be riding the bus with them this year and I want to try to give her ways of dealing with them.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Your daughter will need to be firm with these girls - they do not totally understand social rules and emotions - but that doesn't mean that they should be allowed to treat her the way they do.

    She will need to tell them things like 'don't speak to me like that' and 'no I do not like that'. She may need to tell them she is not happy with them but at the same time move away from them for a period of time to try to get the message over.

    Also, have a chat with the parents.

    It is difficult, but I have seen children on the spectrum progress to understanding the emotions of others.

    There is different degrees of Aspergers which determines the way people with this condition interact and learn.

    Source(s): Work in Education Section with Autistic Spectrum Disorder Classes where children are integrated into mainstream classes.
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I am a Graduate Student Majoring in Special Education. I have worked one on one with a teenager with Aspergers, it is a very difficult and frustrating disorder. I would encourage your daughter to let the girls know how she feels- ie. I don't like when you do _________ it hurts my feelings. Also, encourage her to tell the girls when they do things that make her happy or that are nice, even just using good manners around them like saying "It made me really happy when you invited me over for dinner- I had a lot of fun playing monopoly" It will boost the confidence of the girls with aspergers because they will feel as though they have a friend. It will also remind them to treat others with kindness and respect. You may also want to have a few play dates at your house so that you can monitor what is going on and step in when you feel it is necessary. Try to avoid competitive games or activities- think of things that everyone will enjoy and have a good time doing

    I hope that helped!

  • 1 decade ago

    As an aspie, myself I've had the same experiences and it was hard to adjust to the outside world, sometimes aspies can be little sensitive, but after a while, with a little counseling, psychiatric help, and understanding they can become well adjusted citizens. It was tough on me because I was very immature acting for my age, sensitive and a bit naive. In High School I had to ride the bus, but quit, because it had gotten too hard to deal with some of the other kids.

  • 1 decade ago

    Having aspergers is no excuse for bad behavior. Have a talk with the parents, if you don't get anywhere. Don't allow your daughter to play with them. You wouldn't let her play with regular mean kids.

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  • 1 decade ago

    My son has aspergers and is nothing like those girls.

    It sounds like the parents need to be informed about the bad behaviour and deal with it. Most kids with aspergers want friends so badly that they will do whatever anyone wants them to do.

    I guess some kids with Aspergers may be bullies but none that I've met.

  • 1 decade ago

    Would their parents be open to talking about how they handle this type of thing within their home?

    It's important for your daughter to be clear about her boundaries and expectations; but she also needs to understand that these two understand "the rules" differently than she does. She needs to know that it's ok to not accept their mean/dominating behaviour, and she needs to be able to be constructively assertive on her own behalf. (Sounds like she has a good role model for that :) )

  • 4 years ago

    Aspergers, from what I collect, is an autism spectrum sickness characterised by potential of concern in social interplay and absence of empathy, and obsessive or repetitive exercises. From the appearance of it, those women teach all of those indications. you will could desire to describe on your daughter that they are distinctive from different babies, and that even as they could't help being recommend and impolite each and every so often, they recommend nicely. i recognize you go with your daughter to be advantageous, yet no longer be a pushover, so tell her to be keen to play a distinctive recreation, yet to no longer submit with being bullied by potential of those 2 women. As for the video games that they play, they are of course being given too lots freedom to regulate the different babies (and adults) that they play with. If this maintains, what's going to take place whilst they come back to college, only to ensure that they could't make the instructor do their bidding? they could desire to benefit to play nicely, and meaning no longer continuously being in fee. you need to characterize on your daughter that all of them take turns finding out on out a recreation, or that they play video games with defined gadgets of regulations, like tag and hide and bypass look for. And in the event that they stomp off and pull faces? tell your daughter to tell them that in the event that they do no longer prefer to play nicely, they do no longer could desire to play in any respect.

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