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What do you say to a little humor?
Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews in Italy had to convert to Catholicism or leave.
There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal. He'd have a debate with a religious leader of the Jewish community. If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy; if the Pope won, they'd have to convert or leave.
The Jewish people met and picked an aged and wise rabbi to represent them in the debate. However, as the rabbi spoke no Italian, and the Pope spoke no Yiddish, they agreed that it would be a "silent" debate.
On the chosen day the Pope and rabbi sat opposite each other. The Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. The rabbi looked back and raised one finger. Next, the Pope waved his finger around his head. The rabbi pointed to the ground where he sat. The Pope brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine. The rabbi pulled out an apple.
With that, the Pope stood up and declared himself beaten and said that the rabbi was too clever. The Jews could stay in Italy. Later the cardinals met with the Pope and asked him what had happened. The Pope said, 'First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up a single finger to remind me there is still only one God common to both our beliefs. Then, I waved my finger around my head to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us of all our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He bested me at every move and I could not continue.'
Meanwhile, the Jewish community gathered to ask the rabbi how he'd won. 'I haven't a clue' the rabbi said. 'First, he told me that we had three days to get out of Italy, so I gave him the finger. Then he told me that the whole country would be cleared of Jews, and I told him that we were staying right here'. 'And then what?' asked a woman.
'Who knows?' said the rabbi. 'He took out his lunch, so I took out mine.'
Edit--My Rabbi sent this out for us.
16 Answers
- Tom ZLv 41 decade agoFavorite Answer
Best thing ever to be found here on yahoo. :D This may well be the hardest thing I've ever found to stop laughing at.
- reinadelazLv 61 decade ago
I love it! Almost as good as Buddy Hackett telling the pope that he could feed all the starving children in Rome if he would sell a single painting. The pope replied, "Absconde obisimo illegitimo," that's Latin for "Get outta here, you fat bastard!"
- henkleLv 45 years ago
little Irish Catholic humour A married Irishman went into the confessional and mentioned to his priest, "I very almost had an affair with yet another woman." The priest mentioned, "What do you advise, very almost?" The Irishman mentioned, "nicely, we've been given undressed and rubbed at the same time,yet then i finished." The priest mentioned, "Rubbing at the same time is comparable to putting it in. you're to no longer see that woman back. on your penance, say 5 Hail Mary's and placed $50 interior the undesirable container." The Irishman left the confessional, mentioned his prayers, and then walked over to the undesirable container. He paused for a 2d and then began to go away. The priest, who became into gazing, at as quickly as ran over to him asserting, "I observed that. You did no longer placed any funds interior the undesirable container!" The Irishman spoke back, "Yeah, yet I rubbed the $50 on the container, and in accordance to you, it truly is comparable to putting it in!" x x x
- 1 decade ago
That was pretty funny.
[edit:] I'm going to send this to all my Jewish friends now.
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- 1 decade ago
well i had a smile on before i clicked but when i saw the big paragraphs with good grammar skills i cried
EDIT: ok i managed to read it and that was really funny LOL ahahhahahah good one man
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Hello little humor. How ya doin?
- Dharma NatureLv 71 decade ago
Ah, but the real tragic comedy is that religious people read too much into irrelevancies and coincidences.
Source(s): * no religious belief implied - Light and TruthLv 71 decade ago
Oh I wish, actually the Jews were involved in hiding books and people in their quarter. They were burning books and killing people for "Heresy". Hagadahs included.