Would you get mad if your husband did this to you?

That's awful in a marriage - as far as the finances, it's like a business partnership, or it won't work. I would tell him that he needs to pay you a salary to be a stay at home mom and start charging him a fee to clean his cloths, cook his meals, and any other "favors". If he would invest that "extra" money in something (like index funds), you both could retire a little earlier or take and extra trip. Anyway, he needs to get help with the gambling problem. I like to gamble too, but I go twice a year with $200 and when that's gone, I'm done.

It is your business and the money is supposed to be 50-50, no matter who earns the most. I would say that if he didn't want to tell you how much he lost that it was probably a lot or else why would he get so defensive? I'm sure he learned this attitude from watching his father as he was growing up. You learn what you see growing up. If he is spending that much money each week at the casino, you need to keep your eyes open because it could get even more out of hand. Just think how much $900 could buy. I realize you said it doesn't affect your lifestyle, but I think he potentially has a problem and a chance it could get worse. We go to the casino once in a while too but only if it's extra money and we don't take away from the household. I don't work either but my husband would never go without me or not tell me how much he lost. Keep your eyes open.

a little bit of a gambling problem?? careful honey...it's a slippery slope. The fact is he's a gambling addict. it is affecting your relationship, you and (without him realising or accepting it) himself as well. At the moment, you're in a position where it's not affecting you financially but it's a snow ball affect and it will ontop of the other effects. My Dad is a gambler and has been for the 30 years I've known him and despite him earning alot of money and being well educated he managed to gamble my parents house away (over $1million) and the majority of his income and any financial security for his and my Mum's retirement. My Dad's gambling has caused so much problems in relationships in my family and he's still in denial about it. We're in talks to stage an intervention. I strongly suggest you contact Gambers Anon family support to find out how to help him. Don't let him deflect the issue about him earning the money. That is bullsh*T. Your married and you're a unit. You can help him but it won't be easy. But don't put your head in the sand like my MUm did it makes it worse in the long run. Also, while you're in the middle if it and he's in denial...you may not see how crazy and unacceptable it is that he spends almost 24 hrs in a casino and over $900 a week on gambling but it is! Seek education and help him and your family. GOOD LUCK

You should just explain to him that you are sorry and you didn't realize he was expecting a call from work, but on the other hand, how could you have known? If he is always working, it's hard to know when it's important or just him bringing work home. He is your husband, he should separate his work time and his life time. Ask him if over a weekend or after 7 or 8pm he could leave his phone off sometimes and enjoy spending time with you? I hope it all works out. Don't be too nervous, he did marry you :] He loves you and can't stay mad forever.

yes, i would definatly be mad. people like that dont realize that stay at home parents work just as hard, maybe harder but dont recieve a paycheck. if you are stuck at home, not able to make money and he is the only source of income then it should be both of your guys money, because you work just as hard as him. you deserve to know where it the money going, and you should have a say in where it should go. how would he feel if you spent money that you made on clothes and things you wanted, with no consideration for the family? he would probably feel that you need to contribute your money (if you made some) to the household. im not saying he cant use any money on himself but you should discuss it and decide how much he is allowed to spend on gambling every month or something. it will make you feel better and it might help him with his gambling problem.

i don't know what his problem is that is not his money alone, i don't know if your religious but it says in the bible the sins of the father are passed down to the 4th generation what he's showing has always been their embedded into him he's probably just now choosing to show it. he's got a gambling problem which i'm sure you've already put that together. see if he's willing to set up some kind of system where a certain percentage of his paycheck will go to the casino. i already know that this is not going to work it may work the first 2 times but then he's going to exceed the limit and theirs going to be a big fight so maybe you should just leave it alone and pray about it.

My husband is like that too, He likes to go to the local casinos and gamble and he plays allot of poker on line trying to win himself a seat to the World Poker Tour!! Look at it this way, he may have lost money but I'm sure he has good days where he wins right. I wouldn't worry to much about it, if you guys have money put away and you guys are doing okay, then let him be maybe it's his way to let out some steam. Good luck and try not to stress over it so much.

Of coz i'd be mad.. you're a stay home mum for a reason.. you have your kids to look after.. if you went out to work, and had your own money, he wouldn't dare speak like this becoz he'll become the stay home dad and have not money to gamble.. still that's not how he shud talk to you... tell him that and let him know you have a share to the money as well. That's just not right for him to talk to you like that. Just because his dad talks to his mum that way and she does nothing about it does not entitle him to talk to you like that. He needs to know how to give you the respect you deserve as a woman and more so as a stay home mum.

Yah I would be ticked off too. That money he lost could have went on something positive like on you and your kids. Tell him that you would really appreciate if he looked at things from your perspective. What if you gave a big wad of money to peoeple you dont know and didnt tell him about it and have nothing positive to show for it. And said well its my money. Tell him we are married and decisions need to be made together.

I can see both points of view if he is a good provider and makes sure your family has everything it needs then it might be better to let sleeping dogs lie.He could be doing far worse things,i mean as long as he is not spending the kids college fund at the casino or the house note, but yes if my husband said something like that to me it would piss me off.good luck