WHY DID THE ROOSTER CROSS THE ROAD?

Cos all the chickens got squashed or busy laying eggs.

* KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

* PLATO: For the greater good.

* ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

* KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.

* TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take.

* SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

* JACK NICHOLSON: 'cause it f___ing wanted to. That's the f___ing reason.

* RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

* CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

* HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

* ANDERSEN CONSULTANT: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

* LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken 'crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.

* MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives being called into question.

* MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

* FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?

* RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

* MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

* JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?"

* FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

* BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

* BILL CLINTON: I'm going to say something important. And I'll say it again to make sure you understand. I did not have sexual relations with that chicken. I did not.

* GEORGE W. BUSH (2): We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

* OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

* DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

* EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

* BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

* RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road .. it transcended it.

* ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

* NEW SOUTH AFRICAN POLITICIAN: It is the Apartheid regime which made the chicken cross the road when the chicken did not want to cross the road, the chicken is oppressed and the only way to free the chicken is for the whites to pay restitution for oppressing the chicken and investigate police involvement in the death of chickens. It is racis

do i know you ???? hmmm i think i do....

well here is why the damn good for nothing rooster/chicken/Gallus gallus or anything under the kingdom- Animalia> Phylum- Chordata> Class - Aves> Order - Galliformes> Familly - Phasianidae> Genus - Gallus> Species - G.Gallus crossed the road according to various other people.....

* KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

* PLATO: For the greater good.

* ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

* KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.

* TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take.

* SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

* JACK NICHOLSON: 'cause it f___ing wanted to. That's the f___ing reason.

* RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

* CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

* HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

* ANDERSEN CONSULTANT: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.