Incidents occurring at my job?

Question

I work at a family owned business at a mall *been there for about 5 years*. The family relies on my a lot to make sure the store runs smoothly. A few times my female coworker has come to me saying that the manager who is in his 60s has been saying inappropriate sexual things to her. She has told him repeatedly not say things like that to her and has even threatened to quit. He in the end always says that he was joking with her but she feels very uncomfortable around him. I believe her because 1) this isn't the first time she has come to me about it, 2) another incident like this happened to another female worker where my manager was walking by the sink while she was washing the dishes, claimed he slipped on the wet floor while she was washing dishes and to break his fall he "accidentally" grabbed her behind thinking he was grabbing the sink. I believed this other girl too and she ended up quitting because of it. The family believes that she was making things up but I don't think so.  

Only one time has he said something inappropriate to me but I let it slide.The problem is that he is the father of his two sons who own the store and are also kind of like the managers there. I'm really good friends with the family but I want the two brothers to know that their father is saying and doing inappropriate things to the female workers as well as the male workers and it's important that they say something to him about it. 

I don't know how to tell them that their father is acting inappropriately. He is also very mean to the guys at my job to. He thinks that every boy is a criminal who is going to steal from the store. My brother works with me and the manager is always saying that my brother is a bad egg blah blah and I want to tell him to shut up because he doesn't know my brother's personal life. My manager has no idea that I will quit this job to protect my brother. My parents know that my brother hangs out with people who are not great influences and that he smokes weed but they have talked to him about it and have it under control. My manager thinks that my brother is like his friends and thinks that my parents are not handling the situation. He has no idea that I will side with my brother before I side with this family. I want to tell him to be a parent to his kids not my brother. Ok I'm going off tangent LOL         

How do I tell the two sons that their father is acting inappropriately to my coworkers without offending them? I know it's hard to swallow the fact that your own father is acting like this and I'm nervous that they won't believe me or my coworkers. I feel like I'm the middle man because I'm friends with my coworkers but also with the family. I'm kind of like my coworkers' spoke person and I want their concerns to be voiced. 

I currently cannot quit this job right now so quitting is out of the question.

Only serious answers please.

Montano · Accepted Answer

Tough situation. Either way it won't go smoothly. If it's let go and the man continues on with his rude, self-centered and inappropriate ways then your co-workers and you may become uncomfortable going to work. But then again if you all say something it may cause friction between you and their family and let's just say you may not have them as friends anymore.
 What I would suggest is to have all the workers log down their complaints about this vile man and bring them to the brothers. Maybe having all of your co-workers with you when you complain along with the logs will send them a stronger message. One that can't really be ignored. 
 Also the bastard crossed the line when he is talking about your brother. Who does he think he is? Anyways maybe it's time to move on? Though I don't know your situation at all maybe you are stuck there for the time being. 
 But the sooner you get this out of the way the better.

out of touch · Answer

Sounds complicated, i understand you wanting to say something and that you're afraid that they won't believe you but you need to tell them. if you don't tell and he sexually assaults the wrong girl she could bring up a law suit against the store. I would ask both brothers(and if you could stand the father being there too ask him to join you) for a word privately and would tell them what he said to you and what the other girls told you about him, and if he was joking thats fine but some people take things personally  and become ucomfortable so he doesn't need to joke like that anymore, and also tell them what he says about ur brother and ask them to ask him to stop. If they don't believe you just tell them that you are trying to help them and that a lawsuit is bad for business and don't quit but start looking for another job. hope this helps.

Anonymous · Answer

Take it to like employment rights services, make a full on claim, claim you've gotten stress and shave ya head and wear a bandana thing tell them your losing your hair because of it all and all sorts of problems since it all started happening. I cannot stress how much you need to milk this ****. In the end you will be alot better off.

Anonymous · Answer

Which makes you more upset. His harmless little playfulness or being unemployed? If you say something you wont work there anymore.
Sure, you could always sue them and try to get some money that way.

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Incidents occurring at my job?

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