We're having it for the first time - should I be careful with her?

Question

My GF that'd I've had for quite a while are really close and we are ready to have sex - though I have some worries.

We are both very educated on the matter - she broke her own hymen, so that should be one factor we won't have to worry so much about. 

She knows a good bit - I even taught her some of it. I know all the rules - pace yourself, how to hold an ejaculation, erection, most of the positions, muscle movements. I took the time to train my own PC muscles, surpress and pervent a buildup to an ejaculation - and I've done pretty well so far I think, I've been able to hold for anywhere from 20 minutes to a little over a hour so far. I'm also capable, most of the time, of retaining all-or-most of my erection even after ejaculating, and I can regain a erection even after a large ejaculation that I can't help but go soft after. I am capable of having more then one ejaculation and orgasm from the training - I know that's not the real thing, and I'm going to be stimulated a LOT more with her at first, but I figured it wouldn't do any harm to train up my tolerance.

I know all of her hot-spots, how to heat her up until she's about ready to rip my clothes off herself, etc etc - point is that we aren't oblivious - we are in our 20's, so I wanted to get that out of the way first so people don't get the wrong impression.

The deal is - I am kinda like 6'0 240lbs football material, while on the other hand shes 5'3 around 100 lbs princess-barbie material. I don't want to hurt her.

I will be very passionate for her, and its very likely that we will have long sex - the idea of having a 4-5 hour long grueling all-nighter isn't a far off idea; we are both very healthy and have passionate feelings for eachother, so that probably will be the case.

The problem is - I will be very passionate with her, and sometimes I'm going to want to really manhandle her - and I don't want to hurt her. Now - when i say 'manhandle' - I'm talking about taking her from behind, doing her with just the strength of my hands and arms alone. Or, like - put her up against a wall and drill her - that sort of thing.

I know all the rules - we both know the first time is probably not going to be the greatest, but it isn't going to be long before I will want to ravage her, and I really-really don't want a accident. I'm the kind of guy who on some few occasions have moments where I "didn't know my own strength", and it turns into an accident, and embarrassment.

I don't know if I will be like that the first time - but I know I eventually will, and I really-really don't want to hurt her by accident. Should I be really careful with her, and hold those feelings back - or should I just go for it? She tells me not to worry about it, she's looking pretty forward to it.

Also i was particularly curious about pumping her when i take her from behind, using primarily the strength in my arms, with just my hands on her hips. Could she have a good chance of getting hurt if I did that, or am I ok here?

Aarien · Accepted Answer

It's not just the hymen that makes most first times not-so-great.  Everything is going to be tight... you're going to have to break her in, so to speak.  The first few times are usually a little painful, but if you're gentle with her she should be fine.

Claudia · Answer

Okay, thats a long speech. You obviously aren't embarrassed by each others nudity- which is a good thing i guess. But I know some people that freak out after they see each other nude. Have a shower together first so you get to no each others parts and get her warmed up so she will want to rip off your clothes and have sex with you while your walking to the bed. Then lie in bed together and start. First you should lie on top of her and stick our penis into her vagina. Then roll over so she is on top of you so you dont squish her. If you lie on her first, then you will feel that wall thing you were talking about, then after you roll on her you wont hurt her. Hold her lightly, so you dont hurt her, but kep a good grip on her so she doesnt slip over. If she is hurting you, have sex on the side so it will still work but you will both be safe. I would advise you spend the whole day together. Get her to come over in the morning, and try sex out for maybe, half and hour, becasue the first time you do it, it will hurt a little bit. I'm sure she will know this, but warn her first and tell her your plan. You could lie naked together or just feel each others parts untill a few hours is up, then try for a little longer. Finally, at night you could try the long 4-5 hour sex which is very magical. Then you wont be feeling so nervous, you would be used to each others penis and vagina, and you would be confident on being together, and it wont hurt so much. If you come up from the back, it wont hurt her if you dont pump her to hard. I hope this helps- goodluck

amoureuse · Answer

No offense but you have thought waaaay too much into this. Like some of the preparation you did (not all!) seems kind of unnecessary. Don't worry so much about making it perfect! Trust me, it's not going to be for your first time.

As for how rough you can get, just ask her. Don't do anything you think might scare her or make her feel uncomfortable. Communication is key in any relationship, especially a sexual one.

Good luck and play safe!

Krissy · Answer

Just go easy for the first time and build up in the following sessions. Use protection and have fun! Good Luck

ravipr93 · Answer

You need to calm down and just do it. Sex isn't science, its love. But really, the human reproductive systems are built so that eveb if you are huge and she's petite, you really can't hurt her. If you're still worried just use a safe word.

Anonymous · Answer

Ask the question again after you have a kid out of wedlock? This is a fake question isn't it?

Anonymous · Answer

You seem to be well intuned with the basics. So, yes, you should be careful with her. Good luck.

Anonymous · Answer

haha dude TMI you act like your gonna kill her. lol just let her be on top
thats as simple as i can write it. or maybe she should gain a few pounds and itll be ok

Anonymous · Answer

your thinking to much about it.
i mean yes you should be safe 
and know what can happen.
on the first few times be careful
listen to what she says dont push
or force her. it seems like your
pretty comforable with her.
i dont think u'll have a prob
telling each other wat u like n
wat you dont like u'll end up learning 
along the way. make sure you let her
do wat she wants to.
good luck
and be aware of wat can happen.

Anonymous · Answer

um sex isn't that big of a deal. just let her ride you

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We're having it for the first time - should I be careful with her?

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