i need help, bad situation getting worse, fast,?

Go to an Al-anon meeting, get a sponsor, work the steps...

...but do this AFTER you file a police report.

You may be in big trouble here. If he knows where to find you, you're a sitting duck. You need to take your dogs and get far away from this guy. Contact family, cousins, somebody and get going. Don't leave any traces of your whereabouts or else he may track you down. Get into therapy so that you never get involved with alcoholics with personality disorders again. No matter how rational you sound when you end it with him, he'll hear it differently.

I repeat: You are in danger. Your bad choice may end up costing you your safety or your life. This is an OJ in the making. You need to move out in the middle of the night and don't look back. I don't think a restraining order would keep a guy like this away. If he's hell bent on getting you, he WILL.

Call a domestic violence hotline in your area explain the situation and what you want to do and ask if the boyfriend has the right to stay there...he may depending on where you live, who is paying the bills etc. If he does you may have to get police involved and ask them what to do about getting him out. I agree with rehearsing what you are going to say and be prepared with any counters he may throw at you. Be prepared to see him at his worst... sounds easier then done but keep your emotion out of it as much as possible. Definetely file a restraining order. You may be able to work with the police and ask if they can escort him out of the house without you getting hurt and this alerts police too that he is not a stable person, if he were to come back and try to hurt you there would be a record to go off of. Good luck and stay safe.

I wouldn't worry about icebreakers too much. The next time he goes out, I would have the locksmith round to change all the locks to the house. Then I would have his stuff packed and ready for him when he returns. It might be a good idea to have a couple of friends there and the local police station on speed dial.

1. Contact a lawyer.

2. Have people you trust (friends, family) with you on the 3rd.

3. Make sure he has some place to stay.

4. Have his things ready to go as much as possible.

5 Think of every argument he might have and be prepared with a calm, logical answer.

First of all, be brave... nothing is gonna happen to you. It's your life and take full charge of it.You cannot live with a man like him.You need to inform the cops about the situation and they would provide you with the necessary guidance. Ensure you are not alone in the house, or try to stay somewhere else till you settle this issue.

Best of luck

Well, it ain't gonna get good fast. Like it or not, high prices are the new reality. If turmoil erupts with Iran, I'm sure we'll see an oil spike in prices. The record prices we see today may look like a pittance if a conflict emerges.

You sound terrified, alcohol can make a situation worse but it is NEVER the cause of abuse, please always remember that, the only cause of abuse is the abuser choosing to abuse, there is no excuse, none, he is choosing to abuse you, he needs help fast. You are in danger why jan3rd???? It must be difficult but you must tell the police how scared you are of him, make a report, tell your doctor, family, DO NOT BE ALONE WITH HIM. Also phone womens aid, in the phone book 24hr helpline, they will help you get out safely. Good luck.

Oh my. That sounds scary...I'm not sure what to make of the comment about you sleeping, but I think you are doing the right thing. When you are talking, I would make yourself less in every way, like: "I know I'm not good enough for you, I know I sometimes stand in the way of your happiness, and I don't think you want me to block your happiness...you don't deserve that, and I don't ever want to do that to you."

Do not give him any hint that you are afraid or think he may act out. If he says anything like that, either pretend you don't get it, or say something like "I know we all say things like that when we are angry, but I know you are better than that. I don't believe you want to hurt someone who cares about you so much." etc....blah, blah. It's good that his friend will be there. That way you won't have to submit to any 'last time' madness just because he is flipping out.

If he threatens you in any way, keep a record of it. If it's on voice mail, you may want to say someone else heard it and got irritated, but that you made sure they knew he would never. This accomplishes two things, 1. people generally want to live up to our expectations of them, so it shows him that you believe he would never do that. 2. It lets him know--without forcing you to threaten and remove #1--that someone else is aware of his threats. I'd make it someone very removed from you personally, and maybe not even name the person. If you do name them, do not make their comment so extreme that he would go after them. Oh, and probably not a guy, unless a brother, dad, priest, etc..

You probably know all of this already. Nothing like a psycho relationship to teach you all of these things you'd rather not need to know, eh? One previously kind ex, when he realized I was serious about the breakup, threw me down on hood of my car, banged my head into it, then forced me into the car. We drove around with him playing U2's SoCruel for me for hours. It was ridiculous and awful, but the worst part was when he parked for a bit. Sometimes the best thing you can do is just focus on getting out of that situation. I am sure you won't have to deal with anything like this, but just placate however you must, if you do. Getting out is what matters.

Good Luck and listen to your instincts.

Listen, if you need advice about what to do, you need more than advice. Get some professional help to see why you can't see that you need to get the hell out. Any brain cells in that brain of yours? Call the police if you're afraid.