If God is real, why do I own a Ford Taurus?

The mighty Taurus you shall drive

It will endure as you thrive.

Keep it going for many years

Shifting her through many gears.

That car will take you along the road

Quite a phenomenal transport mode.

So don't be sad and bittersweet

Take her out onto the street.

If I may suggest an alternative spiritual answer: there *is* a real Devil, too, you know.

That would account for Ford Tauruses, people who discuss intimate business on a cell phone in the middle of McDonalds, 'Easy Open' packages that ain't, the gawd-awful music they play when you're on hold for an hour, and a few of the other horrors of modern living.

Edit:

And after reading a few of the answers you're getting, I realize that I forgot one of the worst offenders wrought by the Devil's little cloven hoofie:

People with no sense of humor or the absurd.

I used to have one of those. I think a new God just got elected and he's after you buddy. The Taurus issue is just the beginning.

Better get some lube, my friend.

It is because you have sinned against the creator god! You must now die and burn in the fiery depths of hell like if you crashed your Taurus and it burst into flames! Oh wait that was the Pinto wasn't it... anyway this is proof of your unfaithfulness to the creator god, and his minions will march you straight into the lake of fire! Die you unfaithful traitor die! Bwahahahahahahahaha!

OK I'm done now.

Is Clint Eastwood really in a movie about the Gran Torino?

Henry Ford was an anti-semite, and seeing how "God" has treated the Jews...

Well Jack, I have a Chevy Aveo if it's any comfort..people who need my parking space at work threaten to pick it up and put it in the back of their pick up trucks.

:-P

Yeah, me too. When kind- hearted folk ask me why I don't get rid of the P.O.S. I tell them it's God's way of keeping me humble.

Whoa, I had "no idea' those cars were even around anymore...I thought they were all in the grave yard...You have my sympathy Sir...lol

So do I Jack.

It's ok baby we will get through this.

When the rapture comes there will be plenty of Mustangs available.

*Hold me*

(((Jack))