ATTENTION: I NEED A HONEST OPINION and help!?

ATTENTION: I NEED A HONEST OPINION and help!

Okay this post is because I need another perspective… I am young and I have never really seen any positive relationships in my life both of my parents who were married died when I was young leaving my gay sister to raise me when she was a just a child…..

Anyway, I am 23 woman, I own my own house. I have a car, career, goals and education. In addition, I know that my perspectives on things are sometimes selfish or clouded by my experiences, ambitions, and fears. I recently got back with my daughters father whom has been pretty much a dead beat since she was conceived. His main motivation in life is smoking weed and just merely getting by. He has never had any real responsibilities nor does he own up to the ones like paying a simple cell phone bill or paying probation. Before we split up when I was three months pregnant he had no record/never been in trouble with the law and did not smoke and drink as much as. It is now 2 years later and he has not progressed, he works at fast food joints and now has a record…

Around Christmas: he stayed over a few days to help me unpack and build a relationship with his daughter, in the process he cooked me breakfast etc just really pampered me. Being the strong, single busy mother I am accustomed to, I was loving it . I knew that this was game and I fell for it, anyway..I F*up and I slept with him; I have never been the type to go through the whole baby mama syndrome thing but here I am…. At the time he had a girl, ( same girl he has been with for 2-3 years; same chick that was supposed to be my friend but began to mess with him while I was pregnant. She is a jump off, if you know what I mean… she slept with her sister baby father/ husband and she was married to a man fighting in Iraq.) I have always respected her as a woman despite of the CRAP, so I never crossed that line, although he has always wanted me and wanted “HIS FAMILY BACK”… but she disrespected me and my child and I wanted to prove a point, plus I was horney and happy that I just purchased my first house, graduated and was happy about him stepping up to the plate and beginning to actually become a father and change his ways… Although I felt as if I hated him for what I had endured these past years, some part of me still wondered what it was about him that made me like him…. He pampered me, wash dishes, cooked etc… and that is what I like about him….o’le girl didn’t know about what was going on and that is the way I wanted it. The next day he gave her the keys to her house,(without my knowledge) and moved in with me … not because I wanted him to … I wasn’t even thinking about it…but he showed up with some bags…..

He has been at my house for apx a month now… I see a change and my daughter truly is loving him being around but I am almost sure that I am not happy… I don’t think that he can be the type of man that I desire… he satisfies me sexually, but I am not sure that he can step up to the par financially, and mentally … ( I really don’t make that much, but my main issue right now is that, when he moved all his stuff in my house , (slickly), I told him that he would have to contribute to bills…which Is part of the reason he left me three months pregnant.. because he didn’t want to pay rent; he wanted to spend it on weed and new shoes….lol; (he’s a grown man 27)… the man has given me $80 for the month and this week he has gotten paid and haven’t offered me a dime, yet.. I think he’s back to his old ways…. Like I said he does pamper me and take care of his child now…Am I wrong for being upset that he didn’t contribute more, he does only work a minimum wage place…( I understand it isn’t all about money but dayummm, daycare isn’t even $80..he is at my home, when I am not so lights and everything else will rise…not to mention the darn grocery bill was $200, (anyone know someone who sell stamps? lol) should I get another man, that I am attracted to mentally and physically or should I just see how things go? Oh yea since we split I had been raped and given herpes so I am aware that my dating pool has shrinked, but I know that I truly am a good woman…. He is talking about marriage and ever thing else …but now that he seems ready I am not sure that I want to with him!!! I am sure he is well on his way to becoming a better man but I know we are on two different levels and I am not sure if he is the perfect man for me… but I know I can help him on his path ….its like if I kick him out now, I think I would hurt his path and success of becoming a better person because he has recently expressed how glad he is to have his child with him everyday.and how it gives him slight motivation. Their bond has become stronger than I could imagine these last few weeks and I don’t know if I should intervene. Plus I have no trust for him still….. Although I am trying and know people don’t change over night….

I don’t even like the way he dresses… I like suit tie, business cas