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star if you likey? funny exam answers.. how 16 year olds think...?
The following questions were set in last year's GCSE examination in Swindon , Wiltshire. These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)
Q. Name the four seasons
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar
Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists
Q.. How is dew formed
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire
Q. What causes the tides in the oceans
A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight
Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on
A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed
Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election
Q. What are steroids
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs
Q. What happens to your body as you age
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental
Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery
Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A. Premature death
Q. What is artificial insemination
A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour
A. Keep it in the cow
Q. How are the main parts of the body categorised (eg the abdomen)
A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O and U
Q. What is the fibula
A. A small lie
Q. What does 'varicose' mean
A. Nearby
Q. What is the most common form of birth control
A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium
Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome
Q. What is a seizure
A. A Roman Emperor
Q. What is a terminal illness
A. When you are sick at the airport
Q. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature
A. Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas
Q. Use the word 'judicious' in a sentence to show you understand its meaning
A. Hands that judicious can be soft as your face
Q.. What does the word 'benign' mean
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight
Q. What is a turbine
A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head
14 Answers
- MariahLv 41 decade agoFavorite Answer
They're funny, but as a 17 year old, I'm a little appalled. I know my friends aren't that dumb... well maybe one or two are...
This was my favorite:
Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A. Premature death
:D Thanks!
- ?Lv 45 years ago
i can't believe this is what has come to teens now and days. I feel sick to be in the same generation. I hope they feel true suffering for their actions. i agree that they should be sentenced to life. Just watching the video or hearing about it, makes me sick to my stomach. What pissed me off even more, is that they thought it was a joke while they were being held at the station. One girl said, " i guess where not going to the break this spring" & "oh do i get to go to cheer practice?" On top of that, one of the suspects mother said that the victims should have said anything in the first place!!! What teen doesn't say anything about everything or anyone? Everyone says mean things, even the most grown up people. But it doesnt mean that i victim should get a broken eye and a def ear! Now we know why you daughter is a wild animal. Parents are to blame. Those kids dont know anything. all they know is materialistic objects. No morals or anything.
- 1 decade ago
Ha Ha thats really funny im 15 and im not that stupid
Fav:Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election
LMAO soo funny Thx for makin my day
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- 1 decade ago
Awesome Joke, pretty hilarious, I am 20 now, but I can remember when I would make up stuff on test when I didnt knew what to answer :P Star for you.
- chuxieLv 51 decade ago
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour
A. Keep it in the cow
XD that was hilarious you definetley got a star from me
- LaredoLv 71 decade ago
Good joke in fact it was brilliant and a real good belly laugh. I like the one about your body as you age and going intercontinental, priceless. Here is a star and 30 out of 10 for jokes, thanks.
- 1 decade ago
LOL omgosh wow...
i'm 14 and i know teh real answers for these questions...
... whcih proves that the older you get the more stupider you are XD
- 1 decade ago
That's totally hilarious!! i'm 16...and i can see some of my friends saying things like that. lol! (and i actually did laugh...i'm not just saying that ^.^)
