Is my mother crazy (and if so, what disorder does is sound like)?

Question

It has become more evident the older I get that my mother is...well, she just isn't right.  She cannot be- there absolutely must be something wrong with her.  However, when I look at psychological disorders, mental illness- none of the named issues fit her particulars.
She did have a bad childhood- as did all 6 of her brothers and sister.  They all have decent jobs, homes, are active in their children lives and their communities. 
Over my 29 years, she has lived a severe pattern:
1) normal: weird, eccentric, but does somewhat strive for normalcy and is somewhat active in her children's lives.  This typically lasts 1-2 years.
2) Than she'll suddenly claim that the man she is with treats her horribly, accuses him of some kind of abuse and that she has suffered and given her life for him and her kids...she's been a victim in every possible way.  
3) Than she goes buck wild, dates and parties, dresses provocatively, spends foolishly.  She doesn't care about the emotional stress this causes others, actually she seems incapable of understanding it.  She is illogical, irrational, peculiar, emotionless, self-absorbed...and speaking to her is often like speaking to a 15 year old.  Everything adult- insurance, retirement, jobs- she practically rolls her eyes and does call it all "boring".

She has gone through this several times, had 3 sets of children, given them all up, been in numerous relationships...she is a drain in every way.  Now that I am adult, I am growing concerned that she will soon become a financial burden as well- since she has NO savings, retirement plan, or even health insurance.

She is incapable of adulthood, she is a child.  (Her IQ is probably between 115-120, so that is not the issue)  
Are you aware of any mental/psychological disorder that could be the root of her seeming insanity?

ItsWittgensteinMiss · Accepted Answer

Have you researched Histrionic Personality Disorder?
Although you should really talk to a doctor for a proper diagnosis. This sounds like it could be having a very negative effect on you and your siblings. Perhaps you need to meet with them and discuss ways you can together intervene and make her get her finances in order before she becomes too dependent on you?

cornflakegirl_78 · Answer

It sounds like borderline personality disorder, although she doesn't have the rapid cycling in moods having dealt with someone with it for a long time there were periods where things seemed "normal" especially when you talk about her being somewhat stable with a man and then suddenly shifting and becoming a victim and then the wild behaviour.  I personally found even when things were normal there are still behaviours that are out there - giving too many details about her sex life or even waxing poetic about how fantastic wonderful the person they are with is

seacrist · Answer

4 a grown woman 2 behave like this, have confidence me she's scared 2! She's attempting, without plenty success at doing it gently, 2 warn U. Guilt could desire to B taking part in a piece 2. An inherited ailment is in all probability the final element a mom needs 2 hand on 2 her little ones! attempt 2 pay attention 2 what she's telling U & think of if U have been her how could U experience, that is proberly a alleviation 2 communicate 2 some1 approximately it inspite of each and every thing this time. i'm guessing it became right into a at the same time as in the past? i'm advantageous a checklist could desire to tell U greater appropriate to the probabilities of UR daughter having this comparable ailment as quickly as & 4 all.

TOASTEE · Answer

sure, many disorders

bipolar
schizophrenia

those are the two big ones that come to mind, but she needs to see a doctor to get a diagnosis. Look those up and see what you think. 
It could also be that she is just that way. Some people have low self esteem and need different attention that you and I. Look up what I gave you and see what you think. Otherwise you may want to talk to a doctor about this. If she is a danger to herself or others, you can have her committed.

Anonymous · Answer

This sounds like a personality disorder.   
Passive aggressive personality disorder with bipolar traits?

See this for more information or do a search http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/bv.fcgi?rid=hstat5.section.30267


She needs to see a psychologist for an accurate diagnosis.

David G · Answer

If her mood is stable then that crosses out bipolar and borderline.

It certainly does sound a lot like borderline personality disorder, but that entails pretty explosive mood changes. Much faster then bipolar.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder

Some things to consider:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Histrionic_personality_disorder

twilight_pisces · Answer

Sounds like the inability to grow up and take responsibility for herself, but also could be ADD.  There's also this thing, I can't recall what it is called, but it's the inability to love and have passion or care about anything.

shizzle · Answer

yes - most probable is borderline personality disorder - the person usually has an intellect at or above norm, yet a maturity level of that of the average 12-14yr old.

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/borderline-personality-disorder.shtml

Anchors_aweigh!! · Answer

It sound like manic depressive or multiple personality.  Often, if someone has one mental illness, there may be more.

ragdollsnmaines · Answer

Sounds like Bi-Polar.

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Is my mother crazy (and if so, what disorder does is sound like)?

12 Answers