Is this normal for dads to be so terrible??????????????????????

You just made Tolstoy look like he works for Readers' Digest.

BTW: What happened to #6?

Remember 4 items - 1) Listening 2) Reasoning 3) Understanding 4) Negotiating You could try the long-lost art of speaking with your parents concerning your thoughts and feelings. Choose a time when both parents have absolutely nothing to do. (They can't give excuses, then) Remember that you might need to give up some of your time for this to happen. Also, choose an atmosphere which is conducive for discussion, such as a "neutral" room of the house, or perhaps (if the weather is nice), sitting on a blanket in the back yard. Above all, the atmosphere must be relaxing and no interference, such as TV, other people, music, noisy locations, etc. The simple trick of communicating is CALMLY (and I mean calmly) discussing with your parents your thoughts, dreams, and hopes. Other subjects could also be included. Remember the word calmly. It does no good if one raises their voice and tries to control the conversation. Another trick is listening to their side of the conversation. Don't you dominate the conversation and keep your ears open. Remember, you asked them for their time, so give them your full attention. Most conversation ends abruptly because of non-listening. An item of importance; if one of your parents says something you don't agree with, don't belittle them; instead, Negotiate and ask them what would be agreeable to them. (This tends to work wonders - it makes them stop to think, sometimes helping them realize they just might be unreasonable. But keep in mind - they might do this to you, so have some reasonable answers ready.) Keep the communications open and two-way (or three-way, if both parents are present.) You'll find that listening, reasoning, understanding, and negotiating are very effective ways of communicating and eventually everybody gets what everybody wants. It also shows your parents that you are growing up and possibly ready to handle responsibilities.

ok the peephole in ur door is kinda weird

tell him ur getting older and he needs to trust u (have u done something wrong to make him not trust u) make him relize what a good kid u r compare urself to some bad kid u know and make him see how good u really r. tell him it hurts u that he has no trust in u

if he is really abusing u like (i don't mean spanking) but like hitting u or threatening to beat u should definitely contact the police or try and talk to ur mom about it

hope it all works out for u

i have to agree with Katie. The peephole part is really creepy. You don't deserve this (no one does!) And no i don't have a dad like yours. You need to tell the police and that he is totally abusing you. He doesn't respect you let alone you don't have any privacy. You need to get help quick.

Best of luck.

I feel really sorry for you!

i know its tough having a strict dad im sure he wants the best he just doesnt know how to go about things (((or maybe he just wanted a boy)))??

maybe u should sit down and try to talk to him about it rather then your mom obviously he treats her fine so shes bhlinded to how hes treating you...if he shows no interest and acts like he doesnt care or if you ALREADY tried tot talk to him, maybe when ur at school you can talk to a ounselor and have ur adad come in and maybe they can throw him in some parenting classes.

Try tog o out with ur friends or stay after school maybe just try to have a more active life and stay away from him if this contiunes that way ur barley home.

and if that man so ever lays one finger on you do not hesitate to call the cops because that one finnger can lead to his hands around ur throat. good luck

the peephole part is very creepy to me.

my dad cut my internet to turn off at nine but i convinced him to push it back later. so now i dont have one at all, but he doesn't do the other things your dad does. my friend had a dad like yours. his dad had an anger management problem and had to go to therapy. so did my friend because they dont want him to turn out like his dad.

i think you should try talking to your mom about it more and let her know that it IS a big deal and its not something to blow off. your dad might just be a very controlling man or he could have anger management. either way, it needs to be addressed.

goodluck

I had a dad like just how you described. He just doesn't want you to be like him. I know you are probably to young to understand but he just cares about you deep down. He does not want anything to happen to you. I remember when I was 14 I was so skinny. So my dad told me he wanted me to go on a diet cause I was fat. I also got spanked and hit too. He just wants you to not get hurt.

Your dad is a bad parent a reverse peephole? put sticky tape or a bandaid over it so its blocked.

That's child abuse. You should contact the police. I feel bad for you, but that's really what needs tobe done.I wish you my luck, hon

your dad is not a dad. hes a father and yes fathers can be ignorant. its hormones..just part of being a male sometimes.

here I was thinking my father was bad. yours is much worse. my father:

-often says he doesnt have enough money for something when its obvious he does (he makes more than my mom, yet my mom buys more for me than he does. like one time my mom even said that I needed a dentist he said no I dont have enough money. if he doesnt have enough its probly cuz he gambles it all away...I believe he still gambles because when I turned 18 he took me to a casino for dinner)

-smokes around me, even though I hint that it bothers me

-curses. f-word is said alot by him too.

-I always had to call him if I wanted to see him (he even stood me up once) sometimes he wouldnt even be there and didnt return my calls. then he had his gf lay a guilt trip on me because I didnt call him and he missed me. its like hello you have fingers. use them to dial the phone if you missed me.

-would sometimes fight with my mom in front of me and one day he said something bad about her behind her back in front of me..so he basically would trash talk my mom in front of me alot

-one time when we were camping and we were in his trailer he had this hole in his underwear..yeah like I want to see some of my fathers...ew man just ew

I havent seen him in 2 years because Im sick of it. I also sometimes feel like hes not listening to me. the last time we talked it seemed like he really didnt read what I said on IM because he had an irrelevant response. it made me cry. Im tired of him making me upset. I just cant take it anymore.

my father used to be way worse (to me and my mom) when my mom & him were together. he hasnt really changed because he still doesnt think too fondly of my mom but he pays more attention to me than he used to and he sometimes keeps his comments to himself when it comes to my mom.

your mom really needs to see how he is. you need to prove to her that hes bad news. if she saw, I dont see how she would tolerate that kind of behavior.

if youre really getting abused then you should tell the police if you cant get your mom to see how he is