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Why Does He Act This Way?!?!?
What should I do? (Guys...I need advice)?
The guy I like, and have been talking/going out places/hanging out with/MAKING OUT with since January does not like the label 'boyfriend/girlfried'. Now, I am sorta the same way, just because of the really bad history I have with guys - i.e: they cheated, lied, used and tricked...etc. He and I have become really, really close. And he always talks to me about his day, and he waits for me after our club (we go to the same University) meetings. Today, after our meeting, I was talking to another guy about something, and he had a class that started in about 30 minutes. Suddenly, I see him get up and just walk out. He didn't say good-bye, he didn't wave good-bye either, or even tell me he was leaving. I know I sound overly dramatic, but he never acts this way. Even though I also tried talking to him at the meeting too. He seemed very distant.
Now, I really like him. And he told me that he likes me. We had gone out for coffee a week or so ago, and we were talking about a couple friend of ours that were fighting, and he said (and I quote), "Ugh, that's why I never want a girlfriend". And we went shopping, and my sister came with us, and she has a boyfriend (she's 16) and he started lecturing her about how it's stupid for her to have a boyfriend and that it only leads to trouble.
I do agree with a lot of the things he says, but at the same time, I don't want to be the friend with benefits anymore. What do I do?
Please, give me real answers, not just a mere sentence so you can get the 2 points for answering.
Thanks a million!
3 Answers
- abbeycoolitLv 71 decade ago
I hope that in addition to real answers you also want honest ones. Having said that, here goes. You sound confused and unsure of what you want .Lets look at a few of those issues. 1) You said you do not like the label boyfriend /girlfriend as do your boyfriend.Now you longer like things that way. 2) Since January you were happy wih being a friends with benefits (see number 1 above) and now because you love him more than you believe he does you ,you are no longer in favor of this type of relationship. 3) You claim that your history has been one of guys cheating, lying to, using , and tricking you. Yet after your boyfriend sees you talking to another guy( which could have been innocent), rather than explain to him, you can only consider your own feelings. If this is how you acted in all of the circumstances in which you felt you were being cheated on, I can begin to understand why you might have issues . Don't you realize that you might not have been completely innocent in all those cases and that you have to treat others as you wish to be treated? None the less I will suggest that you talk to your boyfriend.Start by asking him why he was upset, explain about the guy you were talking to and assure him that you were just friends(what would you think and feel if you saw him talking to another girl), tell him how you feel and what type of relationship you now want, and ask him how he feels. Remember that he once told you that he does not want a boyfriend /girlfriend relationship so he might not want to change now.I hope he does and gives you guys a chance to have something special. But do not forget that a relationship involves two people and both are equally important.I wish you the best.
- Chip RighterLv 41 decade ago
You need to talk with your boyfriend. If he is always going to run away at the sight of you talking to another guy maybe he is the wrong guy for you. People that really love each other would never behave in that way. If you let your partner know exactly where you stand you will never have problems. Make him communicate.
Being a friend with benefits is going to cheapen your chances of meeting someone new. Your reputation will proceed you. Do you want a guy who sleeps around ? How special would you feel? Would you believe he is only doing you?
Be careful not to play with anothers heart. Be honest up front and your relationships will be full and have more meaning.
