Shouldn't husband check with me before making money promises..?

I agree with you. The both of you should discuss everything together first and then make a decision about the issue. You should never be second in anything regarding your marriage. Sit down and talk about it with him. The both of you are still learning. :-)

You've only been married 6 months, it's going to take some time for the both of you to get used to being married and compromising on things. I would simply let him know how you feel and that you want to discuss things like this first, because you both need to work as a team, as partners. Then take it from there. But i wouldn't flip out on him over this just yet. Like I said it's going to take some time. The first 3 years are always the hardest.

Absolutely not. Since you've only been married six months, I wouldn't be too hard on him.. He probably didn't know that it would upset you. Just have a talk with him and let him know that since you are married now, decisions pertaining to money and other important issues should be discussed by the both of you, since it affects both of you.

Yes he should have discussed it with you first but don't be too hard on him. What if your mother would have called in need of money and he promised her the money before discussing it with you? Would you still be as upset or is it because it was his mother?

I don't think that your husband should consult with you for every nickle and dime that he spends. And it is awkward especially for men to have to check with their wife for every time he wants to give money to a family member.

With my husband, he has 3 children from his first marriage. Kids are a constant drain on the pocketbook. Finally to allow him to not look like he was asking me for permission all of the time, we set up a line item in the budget called "good dad" money.

As long as my husband stays within that pre-determined monthly dollar amount, he can give money to the kids here and there as they need it without feeling like he has to call the wifey and ask permission...and he feel like he is being a good dad to his kids by spoiling them. Sometimes he has to spend a large amount and he consults with me then. (Yeah, like I've ever said no. Usually it is more along the lines of "ok, do we have enough $ or do I have to spend less elsewhere?") And I don't mind the $10 here; $50 there because I feel like I have a sense of control over the situation too.

I think that he should have told you first. But maybe his mom put him on the spot. Maybe they were talking and she was complaining about having no money. I know that i would definatly just say ok mom i am going to send you money without talking to my wife first. Im not married but he is in a pickel. I would just talk to him calm and say hey it hurt my feelings that you didnt tell me about this first. Its not about the money I just feel like we are a team and we should make decisions together. Just dont get defensive and blow it up into a fight. Its not worth it. Money isnt everything and it doesnt bring happiness. Hope this helps.

You're talking about HIS MOM. Don't forget that. Family is so important!

My own opinion is that he should have told you as soon as possible about his decision- that way, you could have talked about it, even if the money was gone, so that in the future, you'll both be on the same page.

Every couple goes through this in their first year... the details always vary, but this was the single largest adjustment for me, too.

I agree with Tanner. I had a similiar situation with my husband and we are married 5 months. He made a big purchase without discussing it with me first. I was upset that he would spend 1K on something without talking to me about it first. It's my money too!! This is his mom however so, talk to him but be understanding too.

Yes, your husband should be talking to you about money. Did you discuss money before you go married? Did you have conversation about how you were going to handle money? If you did, then I would say you have reason to be concerned. If not, then it is time to have that conversation.

Are you kidding! My husband bought a laptop & printer over 1 week before I knew about it, although everybody else, even our neighbours did. And his response is that he'll buy whatever he wants cause he dosen't need my opinion to get something that he sees the family will use. Ohhh - he hid the bills also.