How to tell my kids I'm gay.?

Well first of all, your wife has been a witch to you because you lied to her your entire relationship. Relationships are built on trust, and you broke that trust by not being honest with her. So please dont blame her for your dishonesty, and a whole 20 years of her life having been a lie. Understand her side of things too.

Now, the kids. I was thinking about suggesting to you to not tell them, but then I would be completely contradicting what I just said, and you would be living a life of dishonesty. You should sit them down, and tell them how you feel. You shouldnt have to walk on eggshells. And dont say anything about their mother to them, because they will probably just cling to her then. Tell them how badly you feel for not being accepted when you were younger, and let them know that you will always accept them for how they are. Just be honest about your feelings. It is better to tell them right now then later. Think about yourself. What if this situation happened to you, and you were 7 years old and your parents got divorced and dad turned gay. When would you rather have known? When you were 7, or when you were a little bit older? Do what you think is best for the kids, not yourself.

Do some research on this topic. Type in "gay divorced man how to tell kids" or something like that!

Good Luck. Do what is best for the kids.

Oh honey I feel for you! Really reading this made me all teary-eyed.

My advice: at some point or another you should tell them. But it depends on what you want long-term? Do you wish to be seperated from your wife when your kidz are older? Or do you want to live the way you are, married to a woman AFTER TELLING your children that you are gay? The latter seems very impractical and heart-breaking in my opinion.

So a. wait untily you decide on what you want in the long run and b. wait until they are a little older (I cant judge their maturity) and c. If or when you have a partner then you must definitely let them know and your wife as well

Theres no point in living a lie or a life of secrecy.

So many people are driven to get married thinking that they would be better off...I am so sorry hun, its not your fault. Just keep your children in mind and hopefully I helped a little.

I wish you all of the best.

I think the thought of you wanting to progress, and not live a lie anymore is great. Thinking about coming out is a step forward.

Here's what I think: The 10 y/o and 7 y/o might be too young to understand at this time. Therefore, I see no obligation in telling them two. If you are going to do so, come out to your wife and 18 y/o. I think it's best for someone to not live a lie and be true to themselves. No matter how they take it, at the end of the day, it only matters that you are being honest. Thing is, it might eventually lead to your wife telling the other two kids, or it slipping out somehow, and you then just need to sit down with them all, and tell them that some men like women, and some men like men, and that you happen to be a man that likes men.

Whatever you decide to do, I wish you the best, and good luck. (HUGS) It's hard coming out, but in doing so, a load will be lifted off your shoulders, trust me. I'm 18 y/o, and just came out recently to my parents. It was heartbreaking, and it seemed like forever after telling them. Someday people will come to terms, or they won't, but you're the one who's gay, not them. As long as you believe and value yourself, you will be a fine husband, dad and man.

Best of luck.

the little ones are 10 & 6. this is not any vast to young little ones that somebody become dropping somebody else off. How does that say you have been caught pink handed?? once you're making an excellent deal approximately this then that's going to likely be an excellent deal. To young little ones "snoozing over" is nearly a special eye social gathering. So what which you slept at a ladies living house? So what in case you slept at a adult adult males living house. young little ones do no longer care. they're wrapped up of their very own international. i might say permit it bypass. i do no longer see a concern here.

I know you said no nasty comments, but Sir you made the choice to live this life and you are a father. Now I wasn't there twenty years ago in South Texas, but I'm pretty sure you had the option of staying single and moving away at some point.

This is not something you just bring up at the dinner table one night. You need to go sit down with legal counsel if your wife tries to declare you an unfit father (assuming you still want to raise your kids).

And you need to sit down with a therapist yourself to make sure you don't dump your emotions on your children or your snarky spouse. I'm not saying "oh, you're gay you're crazy". I'm saying you've been living one way for so long you really oughta sit with someone neutral and work out a plan now.

You should also make arrangements for your children to speak with a professional if they feel the need to as well. A child can't speak candidly with a parent without fear of consequences, that's just a fact of life. It sounds like you want to keep a healthy relationship with your children, and to ensure that you need to allow them a safe outlet for their feelings.

How do you break it to your kids? You don't ask the internet, that's for sure. We aren't the sort of people you need to be talking to if you want this to go right. Get a hold of a lawyer, and find some people who deal with emotions professionally. This isn't just your coming out, this is you altering the reality your children live in.

Good luck man, here's hoping it all works out in the end.

Never actually being in your situation I can't give you advice (though being gay in Texas is still looked down upon, I mean next year I'm going to prom and it's still against the rules to bring a same sex date) but I really just wanted to answer saying best of luck. I really hope all ends well and I'm sure if they aren't okay at first one day they will come around. It's a difficult journey coming out but I applaud you for it, so Manu of us hide who we are out of fear, but what your doing is so courageous. Hopefully if more brave people like you come out it will shine a beakon of hope among all of the scared closeted folk. Thank you and good luck, I dont know if you believe but I'll say a prayer for you and your welfare.

Me, being a part of the younger generation, can tell you that *with a sigh of relief* the majority of us don't care about one's sexuality. Honestly-- you've been there for the past (insert child's age here) years, and you've been a major part of their lives. If you feel it's something you should be honest about with them, that's great. Sit down and have an honest conversation.

Plus, you're a dad. You can tell your son that it's okay to be gay, and well... he'll listen. Come on. Have some faith in your kids. When you're that young, you can't hate anything. :)

I think before I even brought it up to them I would bring up gay people in general. Get their views and then explain that just because someone is gay it doesn't make them any different then heterosexuals. After that I would talk to your ex-wife and tell her that you're planning on telling your children. I would check with her only first because this can backfire on you seriously. And then after I've gotten their views and takes on it and if I thought they could handle it I would tell them.

Look, I know a man with a same story only difference is she didn't mite him being guy.

This is a tough thing to go through.

I would just tell the older ones that would understand.

The young ones that won't understand, tell them that you and your wife just can't be together.

I hope I helped somewhat.

GOOD LUCK.