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Husband selfish to the point of insanity (mine!@!!@!)?
Any other gals stuck with a guy who thinks he can be a jerk, just because he "Works Hard" during the week? How do you deal?
My hubby of six years has an outside job, while I stay at home and look after our 2-1/2 year old son. i also keep the 2,250 square foot house clean, cook gourmet meals (used to be a chef), do the gardening, do the accounting for his business, pay bills, and do home maintenance like plumbling, painting and furnace repair. But when he gets home he just wants to know where his dinner is and then he leaves to go out with his friends. I asked him to sit our son for two hours this weekend so I could get on the computer and file the GST, but he said he really wanted to clean up the yard and couldn't spare 90 minutes. Then his buddy called, and he managed to find 6-1/2 hours to go out on his motorcycle! Ok I'm venting, but I'm getting stepped on big time here and need advice on how to grow a backbone - seems I was away the day they handed out spines.
I have suggested counselling but he won't go. I am very isolated since he moved us from Ontario to Vancouver Island and I don't know anyone here.
He's always been a little selfish but since he llost his dream contract (he drives a transport truck & was making $82 an hour) he is now miserable all the time. He's started drinking again (we met in AA, 7 yrs ago, I'm still sober). He now has a contract he hates & it pays a lot less $$ too, so I understnd that he's under stress. I jsut can't take it much longer, I want to go home to Ontario! Thanks for listening.
5 Answers
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
Sounds like you may be the selfish one. Consider it, seriously. He's working long hours, provides for you and your child, and with the economy like it is, with people fearing the loss of their jobs, it's going to be stressful for him.
Worst thing you can do is start making demands (like moving "back to Ontario") and refusing to be there for him.
With all of these things you need to change, you also need to tell him you'd like to talk about your issues with him. Maybe you should plan a night out to yourselves... go to the bar, get trashed, meet some people -- have fun. If he absolutely ABSOLUTELY refuses, then you're more entitled to stop doing your part, at least partially. Good luck.
- 1 decade ago
As an ideal wife (from your point of view), you are doing everything like taking care of baby, housework, cooking, paying bills etc. This takes a lot of time from you.
I would suggest, to give time to your hubby. Ask him to go on a trip as a family.
When he comes home, talk with him the subjects which he likes. Ask him to share for doing household chores.
get some nice movie so that he would sit home to enjoy.
Make friendship of wives of his friends, convince them to have their own husbands at their own house. This would solve your problem.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Plan a day out but tell him in advance you will not be home that day and it is also his child so let him know he is going to babysit for you.Tell him a marriage is suppose to be equal.Please do not let him bully or intimidate you in to just being the housekeeper -cook-cleaner-book keeper-ironing lady-nanny.Stand-up and let him know that you are a individual if he do not like it then I hope he may change for the better.
- zero toleranceLv 41 decade ago
well, he is a TRUCK DRIVER! what do u want? u want intelligent man with good manners should have married a prince. if a prince would have wanted u of course
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