Am a lonely wreck !! Why ?

you are very much in the throws of a depression bout!

you much force yourself to go out and do things, i know it going to be hard, try not to shut your friends out, they can help.

i got to this stage well beyond it, and i know its not pretty. try not to rely to much on the calming drugs as you could get addicted. have you told the threapist how you feel? did it not help or did they not suggest something? if you fancy a chat or something you know where i am.

I think it's weird that you were prescribed Xanax, which is a tranquillizer, and Adderall, which is methamphetamine salts. One is very much a "downer" and the other is very much an "upper". Adderall affects people with ADHD different than it does people without ADHD; that is, it theoretically helps an ADHD person focus. However, even a person with ADHD will generally feel the side effects (at first anyway) of feeling a little hyper, jittery, etc. Those jittery side effects are pretty much exactly what a person who has panic attacks would NOT want.

Wellbutrin has also been known to cause "hyped up" or jittery side effects and that is why it is not generally prescribed to people with depression and anxiety.

I'd talk to your doctor about being on this drug combination. The Adderall and the Wellbutrin are what's killing your appetite. I think you need to take less or else different medications.

If you think you have these conditions simply due to seeing your father, and you had not seen him looking so much older before, it could have to do with realizing what awaits you and all of us. I visited both my parents in nursing homes for 3 years and it was extremely stressful, especially since they shared rooms and I had to keep looking happy. I never took anything for it; I just got thru it. It did help that I had a new husband and new homes then, it really did. I have been thinking of my death frequently since then and it's been ten years. So now I'm on a Life Extension kick, obsessing on how to change my eating habits, start exercising,

reading about longevity and telling myself that everyone dies but wanting to die a painless death, somehow. If the drugs don't work, don't take them. I don't consider counseling since i realize that counselors fear old age and death too. They're just humans like the rest of us.

You doctors diagnose from their training .... not necessarily how to heal you, which they dont know how...

Here is the best resources i know of to heal you , if you include them with a healthy diet and exercise...

Have your hormones checked by a naturopathic doctor in your phone book trained in balancing them..... this could be the sole cause of your problems, and regular doctors dont test this (thyroid, sex, adrenal, cortisol)

Here is a free healing method that has healing , yes healing for ADHD stories , depression and many other things... please check it out, learn it and apply it...start with exactly what you have said here.... it works... please try it... it is advanced physics....

Hormones out of balance cause panic, depression , etcetc