Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and beginning April 20th, 2021 (Eastern Time) the Yahoo Answers website will be in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.

Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Social SciencePsychology · 1 decade ago

Why are you so afraid of strangers?

Everybody has to commute everyday or at least take some sort of public transportation throughout the week. Most of us think that we are losing our time because our parents probably told us not to talk to strangers.

I, for instance, every time I have to do it, I try to engage in a conversation with someone I never met before.

Do you do that? And if you dont: why are you so afraid of strangers?

Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3Z5jBds8As

11 Answers

Relevance
  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I enjoy talking to people I don't know, I get bord with the people I do know so I need new conversation to stimulate my brain. Some of the most fascinating people are the ones you least expect. I enjoy acquaintances more than friendships. Acquaintances require a little information and you can pick at their brains for a little insight and send them on their way. Friendships are too comfortable and require too much work for me; I hold back more of my deeper self in order to continue to keep the friendship as new as possible.

  • 1 decade ago

    I have no fear of strangers because I accept that the majority are good people who are generally happy and mentally healthy. I also accept that some are dangerous and others are simply too introverted or cynical to waste the time on. Being prepared for either one of these types assuages fear.

    Though I am friendly and more than eager to carry on a meaningful conversation, I am of the personality type that does not suffer insipid or meaningless conversation. I find tranquility and peace just being with people, so I do not find a little silence to be socially awkward. Even among friends and family, I do not feel the need to converse always.

    That is why when in a public situation I most likely would not initiate any sort of communication; but if started, I am a ready participant. It is not out of fear that I keep silent, but rather, I generally do a lot of deep introspective thinking while commuting. I suppose I project my own mindset on others, assuming that they are likewise enjoying a meditative break from the grind of everyday life.

    I guess you could say that our culture – both as it relates to the society in which we were born and raised as well as in the home – coupled with our own mental attitudes and predilections determine how outgoing we will be in public. I would not say that one who is silent is necessarily weak, or one who is outgoing is strong: it is just an outward manifestation of his inner psyche.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think it is pretty much built into us to fear strangers. I watch my granddaughter, a precocious child who from an early age looked askew at strangers. Now approaching three, she is still shy around strange people and yet so talkative otherwise.

    And there is the element of sex involved, a man friendly with women can get a real cold shoulder. I personally agree it can be interesting talking to strangers, but not always easy. Paulo, you have a gentle face and age so you are ok. lol

  • doc z
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    I do, and also find it rewarding and surprising. People are happy to talk if you want to listen. But what's your definition of fear? I exercise caution with strangers, some I don't choose to get involved with. Some are energy vampires and a drain on your psyche. Can you spot them? I usually can, I think it's part of social awareness..."street smarts". And remember: If you get up and walk away from them, or tell them you don't want to talk, they have heard it many times before from others and won't be too surprised. Don't be afraid to hurt someone's feelings when they don't care about yours. (I tend to be too polite.)

    I also enjoy having the time on a bus or train to read or just observe people, so I never think of it as lost time.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 1 decade ago

    Avoidant/Schizoid Personality Disorder

    xoxo

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    Yes I do the same while commuting. Good ideas come from them and the time also passes fast.

  • I am very rebellious, so I never listened to my parents since I was little pretty much. Depending on what mood I am in, I talk to strangers. I met a guy from France at a Wal Mart, and I live in a place where many people have never met a French person before.

    Where I live though, I am little scared to just talk to people unless I am in a party or something. I shouldn't be scared though, because the best memories I have had in my life were when I let my fears go and took chances. My worst for when I failed to act.

    I should have learned my lessons but I am still trying my best. Now that I do volunteer work for politicians I talk to many "strangers". I try not to let what they think of me bother me because I know someone down the line might need my help someday or need me to make them smile if they are having a rough day or what.

    I like to talk with people from other countries, I just have to work on my communication skills sometimes to think of what to talk with them.

    If I am in a certain state of mind, I am very excited and say random things to people I have never seen in my life. For example, there was a business man sitting down with his head in his arms on a table. I thought he was depressed, so I sang gospel to him. I also asked him if he wanted to meditate with me, he started smilling but said he was alright.

    On monday I was in this place called Wheeling, in Illinois and the rich older guys didn't seem to want to talk to me maybe because they didn't want to look like a rapist or something. I was at a sushi bar with older people that wore fancy clothes, they kind of just stared at me I didn't know what to talk about. I wasn't even supposed to be there but I was running away from this old guy that was trying to get with me.

    I have a lot of crazy moments with strangers these days because my parents are sort of kicking me out of their house.

    I am very happy though, because I am a rebellious nut.

    My boyfriend would not be happy if I went up to random guys the way I used to. In fact, I don't think he wants to know what I did in California. I used to to pull pranks on guys I didn't know, I and tell my cousin to spit on the people below us when we were in a balcony in a high building.

  • Trent
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Is that, the only time you talk to strangers.

    When you are, Commuting and,you are never mistaken, For being a potential assailant, aren't you lucky.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I first look who is it, if he/she seems open and positive i start a conversation. Thing in big cities is that there are so many people, you can not notice them all, pay attention to everyone you would go crazy if you would. Also some people in cities are very sick and feeling bad, it's dangerous to "get close" to them, it's just survival sense. I countryside it's easy to trust and get close.

  • jojo
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    i am not afraid of strangers on public transport but i don't feel the need usually to chat to them... sometimes is do but mostly i just don't bother

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.