Reasons not to mess with children..?

Question

1)
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. 

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". 

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"

The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ". 
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2)A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing.   
She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. 

The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." 

The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied,    
"They will in a minute."
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3)
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. 

After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill." 
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4)
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.

"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' 

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "AND THERE'S THE TEACHER.....SHE'S DEAD" 
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I hope this made you laugh.....if you have read it...
Just wanted to share with you guys....

Thought of concluding this question with a fun-fact.

DID YOU KNOW?
Strange-but-true 
The average four year-old child asks over four hundred questions a day..

OK!!! BYE!!!

You&#39;ll Never Walk Alone · Accepted Answer

Actually, when I was reading this I was thinking how the grown ups and teachers would have felt so I wasn't bursting out in laughter but TODAY'S CHILDREN HAVE GROWN MORE SMART.

Believe me, My 14 year old brother lectures me and I am 17... haha. Although he doesn't know that he is wrong he comes up with strange explanations.

grub · Answer

1.a little kid gets on a bus and sits behind the bus driver

he starts saying if my dad was a daddy lion and my mom was a mommy lion then i would be a baby lion, if my dad was a daddy hippo and my mom was a mommy hippo then i would be a baby hippo.

he gose on and on like this for about an hour until the bus driver gets pissed off and says

if your dad was gay and your mom was a hooker what would you be?

the little kid says then i'd be a bus driver.




2.a teacher of a kinder garden class asks her students to draw something exciting they did over the weekend on the board

little timmy goes up to the board and draws a dot 

the teacher asks what it is and he says it is a period so th teacher asks what is so exciting about it and timmy says i don't know but me sister missed hers and it made my mom faint, my aunt cry, the boy next door to run away,and my dad chased him with a shotgun.

if you don't get it timmy's sister is pregnant missed her period lol
teen pregnancy isn't a joke people lol

Anonymous · Answer

I don't get the end of the second one, what does she mean by they will in a minute, is she going to kill them all in a minute?

JapaneseLotus · Answer

I liked the first one the best! XD

Anonymous · Answer

They were hilarious, my favorite was the first one. I will give you a star and a thumbs up!

? · Answer

Excellent.  Very funny, all of them.

Black Leg Luffy · Answer

Oh my gosh! the jokes are hilarious!!! 
Good job!

Monica · Answer

that was quite scary... a bit.
children now a days kind of freaking me out.

Anonymous · Answer

little kids are evil

Bear:) · Answer

That was really funny :)

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Reasons not to mess with children..?

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