Is it my imagination . . .. or do people use the term depression?

True depression is where the physiology of the brain is affected, it is a legitimate condition. However I do agree that the term depression is used too much and is almost a way to institutionalize sadness.

Is it my imagination . . .. or do people use the term depression?

and stress as an excuse?

It seems to me that some folks, not all, clamor to the term. Everyone gets depressed sometimes - I mean life can be tough and it sure isn't fair. Then there are those who are clinically depressed and don't seem to have the tools to work past it and require therapy and medication. And then there are those that are too lazy to live there lives or change their lives and use depression as an excuse and keep talking and talking about the problem to try and get others to solve it for them, while they do nothing but garner attention for "poor me".

It seems to me that people use the term "depressed" or "stressed" whenever life is dealing them a tough hand. To me, how we deal with adversity shows what we are made of, our charactor is developed and honed as we learn. And while not easy, in the long run we are better people for learning how to deal with these bad things that we encounter or that just happen to us.

For example: my bf / gf left me 3 months ago and I'm so depressed - what should do? Why not keep busy, read, write take up a hobby go out with your friends. Is this too simplistic?

My mother is sick, I want to put her in a home, but i feel guily, everyone is telling me what to do and I don't know what to do and I'm so stressed and depressed. Make a decision - one way or another - don't let others determine what you do or don't do - then live with the results - I don't think this is difficult.

My friends at school pick on me and tease me all the time, I don't know what to do, I'm so stressed and depressed. They aren't your friends - find new ones, we deserve to have friends that appreciate us and to be treated well.

It seems that in many cases it's a selfish way to get attention and to divert attention from a situation that requires action. Then it's the "no one but me understands" what I'm going through. And that's true, but don't we as individuals have some sort of control over our destiny? Shouldn't we step up to our own lives and make the changes that we see fit?

Sorry for the rant - and the length of the comment. I do understand that at times we all need help to deal with life - yet how long do we linger on a problem or situation before we should deal with it and move on?

Update: Devin - I don't want to knock anyone - I have been depressed myself and have looked to others for help. I have helped many others, or tried to. Yet, why doesn't the real desire and need for assistance trump the desire to talk and talk and talk about something and never do anything about it. That's what confuses me.

I think that people do use it as an excuse. I have a close friend that went through a rough patch and was clinically depressed and when things were better she would have a bad day and "be depressed" and just sleep the rest of the day off. It is easier to escape life rather than face it and I thing that people do abuse the term depression.

I do think depression is used often when people are feeling down about something and i have heard many of my friends say they have depression but within a week are back to their normal happy ways.

This does annoy me as if they were truly depressed then they wouldn't know what hit them. I have depression and at times it can be devastating to me and the people around me, i have tried to take my life and was nearly sectioned for my own safety.

I couldn't get out of bed and would cry uncontrollably, this lasted nearly a year and after getting treatment for a year i am feeling better. I have down days but i will not say my depression has come back as i know everyone has down days.

Wow - I do feel true empathy for those afflicted with depression, I've been there and it is a debilitating disease. It took months to climb out of the hole that depression allowed me to slide into and I hope I don't have to face that challenge again. I couldn't have made it without the help of friends and even folks I didn't even know. It was not easy.

But I think what you are talking about is those that "want" to be depressed because it gives them the attention they crave. Is this what you are talking about?

I see lots of folks here on YA, that need help, that need a few words of wisdom to prompt/assist them to jump start the solution to their problems. But I also see folks lamenting day in and day out about the same problem. Many people offering them sound advice, some bad nasty (but this is YA!) - and they keep asking the same question over and over again. LIke they are waiting for the answer they want to hear. Which says to me that they already KNOW THE ANSWER but want the attention - the oh look at me I'm "depressed" and can't think for myself.

I feel badly for those that are truly depressed, but not badly for those that only want to focus attention on themselves.

Well, i'm not quite sure but in my opinion, I think so. When your depressed, your probably going to think sad stuff or even mean and bad things. Your imagination may turn into a really cloudy and evil place or something. Or, you wouldn't even want to imagine anything or can't because your too depressed to. It's complicated. If you want, go ask a doctor or a counsiler or something. They should know.

Over the last five years I had begun to have increasingly withdraw into a downward spiral of depression..

But now with the method I can fully focus my energy and thoughts into a decisive line on how to make my life better constantly. And it works like magic! I'm beginning to attract people to me once again and things have just been looking up since then.

Helping you eliminate depression?

I agree with you wholeheartedly, that the term "depression" is bandied about too much. I think the problem is that people don't take it seriously enough, and they don't realise that saying "Oh, I'm Depressed" when they're not is like saying "Oh, I've got cancer" when they don't.

Some people go through difficult times in their lives and find themselves lacking in the strength to deal with it, and there's nothing wrong with that, but it's too often that they decide that they are depressed because of it. The very reason that doctors, when diagnosing you, ask about recent activity in your life - break up of relationships, loved ones dying, moving house, getting fired - is to rule out reasons other than clinical depression for depressive symptoms.

Your comment "doesn't the real desire and need for assistance trump the desire to talk and talk", I don't agree with, because when you're depressed you often feel like simple everyday tasks are too much to manage, let alone taking on your condition and fighting it. I think that's the point of depression, what makes it so hard to deal with, and what makes it more than just a tough time in your life. A person with depression may be a normally motivated, intelligent, rational being, however depression has a way of robbing you of the very tools you need to fight it.

Anyway, that's just my opinion. I think that we need to forgive people with depression for taking it out on others sometimes, and for not being able to fight their condition, so long as they are trying as hard as possible not to take it out on others, and doing their best to fight their depression.

I agree with some of the things you said, and I'm glad you made the distinction between a depressed phase and clinical depression. But I really don't see the merit in criticizing people who are open about their stress and depression in life. Are some of these people just crying out for attention, with no real goal of helping themselves? Sure. But not all. In fact, I would bet you the majority of these people genuinely want to help themselves, and get over their problems. When they hear you say things like "you're being lazy" or "you're just making excuses," they don't feel motivated to help themselves, they probably feel shittier. I know you're well-intentioned, and I know you want to help your distressed friends. So why not find a new way for you to help them help themselves?

Advice is valuable, as long as it is good advice. There is nothing more

dangerous than opinions from people that have no foundation or true

life experience in confronting or dealing with what you personally are

going through.

Take control of your life, deal with things you have absolute control

over. The rest will have to sort itself out. Don't paint yourself into

corners, Always leave a trap door to escape from. Opinions from

alledged friends and even relatives who don't have a hands on

respect to what your dealing are like ******* everyone has one.

I want you to take each problem you are dealing with, apply the

Ben Franklyn method to them. Draw a T. pro and con each side.

Bottom line will give you the decision you have to make. If you

need to enlist the aid or help of a professional do so. Walk in Peace.