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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Entertainment & MusicJokes & Riddles ยท 1 decade ago

You Might Be A Redneck If............?

1.Your nickname is Billy, Gator or Goober

2. The Big Dipper makes you thirsty

3. You ask a widow for her phone number during her husband's funeral.

4. Your dog passes gas and you claim it.

5. If the tooth fairy ever left you an I.O.U.

6. If you think the last four words of the national anthem is "Gentlemen start your engines."

7. If you think a six pack of beer and a bug zapper is quality entertainment.

10 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    LOL!!!! Very funny!!! Here's more to add to your list:

    YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF YOU........

    You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

    The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.

    You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

    You think a woman who is out of your league bowls on a different night.

    You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

    Someone in your family died right after saying, 'Hey, guys, watch this.'

    You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

    Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

    Your junior prom offered day care.

    You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines".

    You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

    The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.

    You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

    You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

    You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

    You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

    If you mow your lawn and find a car.

    You've ever been accused of lying through your TOOTH.

    If your family tree has a rope hanging from it.

    If you think Old Yellar is the name of your grandfather's tooth.

    Old yellar is the name of your spouse's underwear.

    Old yellar is the old lady up the road hollering for her grandkids to come in out of the rain.

  • 1 decade ago

    You ask a widow for her phone number during her husband's funeral.

    lol...its hilarious!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    8. if your wife has a jello mold of Elvis Presley's head

  • 1 decade ago

    Haha! Good one! I like #7!

    Source(s): Me
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  • 1 decade ago

    if you go to a family reunion looking for a wife

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    i love # 3

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    hahah my Aunt got that book

  • 1 decade ago

    BAHAMA!!!!

    See My dog is also happy after reading this

  • 1 decade ago

    lol thats funny

  • 1 decade ago

    ...or if you mow the lawn and you find a car.

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