I'm 29 with 2 kids in an emotionally abusive marriage but my husband is loyal to me. I dont know what to do.?

Good heavens. Your husband is an abusive dick, he's not going to change. A few things...berating your 6 year old daughter for fidgeting, getting upset because you walk the kitchen while you're on the phone, slamming your head into the wall during "play" is all about abuse and domineering tendencies, probably to compensate for his own insecurities and tiny dick. Get with a friend, call a trusted relative, file reports (if you can) and get out. Now. You are not doing your children any great service by showing them that an abusive relationship is tolerable just because their dad doesn't rape them or **** other women/ men.

As for being alone and not being wanted, well, it'll be hard for awhile. From your query it seems you've been married since you were 21, that's young, you know little else. 30 is hardly the end of the spectrum, there's plenty of guys with or without kids that married young and find themselves divorced 10 years later. You have a long time left in your life and years more for your kids...do your family a favor and drop the dude before he seriously hurts you and your daughter is raised to believe, like you do, that all men are cheaters, molesters and assholes. Your dad/ step dad may have been, most are assuredly not.

Find a lawyer, shelter, womens advocacy, something. Get your life back. Feeling unsure about yourself is expected, your husband is certainly a big contributor in making sure you feel that way. Good luck.

C~

You don't measure the value of a man by what he doesn't do BUT what HE DOES. You are living in an abusive relationship, this man is torturing your own children and yet you do not see the emergency of leaving. That man is destroying your daughter's self esteem. He's yelling at her, criticizing her every move. A dad is only important when he's being a supportive dad!! If he's not then he's just ANOTHER ABUSER.

Your daughter will become YOU. She will grow up and marry an abuser and he will be shoving her head in the wall, beating her, putting her down, that THAT will be ALL YOUR fault!

Stop the abuse cycle here, for the sake of your little girl, NO MORE abuse! Get out of there.

Your a mother you don't have time to be lost. Get out now before you or your children get seriously hurt or worse killed. You should have gotten therapy along time ago so you could try to heal your wounds which are obviously still fresh. You don't need a man in your life to be a "father" for your kids. A lot of woman raised there kids alone and do a great job. You are failing as a mother if you don't put your kids lives before your own. You are weak because you choose to be. Get off your soapbox and grow up. Stop all the whining and get the help you need. Your not the only woman to have kids and to be in an abusive marriage. They got out and so can you. Do it now before CPS comes and takes your kids because you allowed the abuse to continue. Who cares if he never cheated that doesn't score any points.

Honey, we really need to raise the bar here. You think he's so great because he doesn't cheat on you, but he YELLS at your and your children and shoves your head against a well. I can't even imagine the yelling part with my boyfriend. HIS head would be through the wall! You are a mother now, before being a wife and it is your duty and obligation to protect your children. Mama bear where are you? Fight for your children. That little girl that is being yelled at will one day grow up thinking all of this is okay and she'll put up with the same. Do you want that for her? If nothing else, do it for your children. They did not ask to be born. You must protect them at all costs. Good luck!

Loyalty, that's the only reason your still with him? REALLY, I mean come on dogs are loyal too, but at least they won't emotionally abusive. Look, even though he still hasn't cheated on you,no one deserves to treat anyone like that, especially in front of your kids. Its sometimes better to have no parent, than an abusive one. Bottom line, you need to show strength, just because your stepdad was abusive, doesn't mean that all are. If i were you, i would have left, at least so the so the kids wouldn't have to feel so scared, really who Wakes Up YELLING? Dude has problems, probably most likely a control freak, using you as his little guinea pig he can control. I would advise you to leave him, trust me you'll feel liberated. Come on your still young, trust me, you'll find mr. right.

You are weak. You are harming your children. You either leave this man and be on your own, leave this man and find a decent man, or you stay and subject your children to this abuser. And you cant know for sure he isnt cheating. That kind of man sounds like a cheater. By the way, my step dad loved me more than anything in the world and I was the light in his life. So that is false.

You need to read your own question over and over again before it clicks in your mind. The answer is so obvious to us that I don't think anyone can actually believe you are asking this question. Who cares if he's loyal to you, if he's abusive in any way, shape or form then that automatically cancels out any positives he may have.

Don't put your kids through this.

He sounds BI-POLAR, My husband is a step dad to my two daughters and he couldn't be a better father, In fact he is a better father than their bio dad.

So you like his loyalty?? What about your swollen head? He was playing? What happens if he "plays" to rough with your daughter??

How can you let your daughter be brought up in house with this abuse?

Believe me you are better off alone than with this person. He clearly needs help, And the only way to do this is to leave. You have only one person to think about YOUR daughter. And I hope you realize this soon before it is too late. I hope you make it to thirty.

OMG--- Your kids should come first.. How can you allow that behavior towards your daughter? That makes me sick to my stomach.

I would leave your husband--- no question about it!!

Sorry I stopped at abusive.......and children..........Just because he doesn't cheat doesn't make him a winner. Please break the chain any way that you know how. Insist on counseling. You for your confidence, him for his abuse......together as a family.....