Would you stay, or would you leave?

Move away.

You can always move back "home". You can visit your family regularly or have them visit you.

Small towns suck for having the "rumour mill" run rampant!

Leaving does not make sense. In fact, if you leave and she does spread rumors and put you down it will be much worse when you come back to visit your family. People will remember what she said about you and not who you really are. They might even believe you left because what she said is true.

If you do not believe the relationship will work after 10 years, the real question is why did you stay for so long already? What really makes you believe the relationship will not last? You mention character incompatibilities, but they did not make you leave before. There is no perfect character match. No matter who you stay with there are going to be some clashing character traits.

You say that if you break up with her, she will hang around your house. That is not really very likely. I am sure she would be angry, hurt and quite upset, but she would move on too. You mention that you live in a town of 80K people. That is not a small town. There are plenty of people for her to spend time with and I would imagine that she would do that rather than hanging around your house to bad mouth you.

It sounds like you really need to think about what this decision means to you. It has taken you 10 years to decide that you might not want to stay and you still have not really made up your mind. If you leave her, you might be throwing away the best relationship of your life over petty differences.

On the other hand, if what you are not saying in your question is much more than what you have said, breaking up might be the answer, but leaving home because of a relationship is never an answer.

Take care,

Troy

So many people today ignore the signs right in front of their faces. If there are core differences between the two of you then do the right thing and break up. This does not mean you have to leave town on the contrary if handled properly like an adult you might find if anyone does the running it will be her

I understand what it's like to feel someone's presence around every corner in a certain town. I always get really worried when I return to my hometown (of approx. 80,000 people as well) that I am going to run into one of my psycho exes.

If I were you, I would stick around for a couple months just to see if she really ends up turning into a jealous, stalker *****. If she doesn't, then you don't have to move! If she does, then consider moving to a nearby city so that you aren't that far away from your family.

You've been together for 10 years but you think she would stalk you, and try to make you look bad? Wow. That seems strange to me. Why would she do this? I think everyone should live somewhere else (ideally in another country) for a while before settling into adulthood. There is a unique perspective that comes from seeing new things, and different cultures. It opens your mind a bit. My advice is to go, for that reason.

If you feel you will be happier and live a more productive life if you left then I would say leave. If you are just doing it to run away from your problems then I would say stick around and get your problems resolved before you leave.

bodily I leave. until I quiet down. i comprehend myself properly adequate to comprehend how I continually sense much less dissatisfied approximately some thing if I get rid of myself to "cool off". yet I stay interior the relationship. it frequently takes plenty for me to stroll faraway from somebody, romantic relationships and friendships alike.

Why are you leaving though? To move on with your life or to get rid of this girl? If it's the latter... just do it and get it over with. Let her talk all her nonsense. People who know you won't believe her anyway.

Make a Clean break, by being honest with everyone involved.

be honest with her and let her know you'd like to go out into the world, not about dating new people, but learning more about yourself, and DO NOT let her come with you