i had an abortion about 7 weeks ago. im full of regret,got pushed into it. shall i have another baby? feel poo?

First, I am sorry you are in pain and guilt ridden.

This emptiness is going to stay with you the rest of your life. Having another baby is not going to fill the void. Having another baby now will put you in the same position with your family that you were in when you were pregnant with your most recent baby. I don't know what area you live in, but most areas have pro-choice places that will counsel you for free after you have had an abortion. If you have this much regret, you will probably gain a lot of comfort from counseling.

I can understand why you are resentful toward your boyfriend. Take what you can from this experience. Whoever you are dating (or having sex with) should be on the same page with you. Especially if you are in a long term relationship and having sex, ask him what he'd feel like if you got pregnant. This way you get an idea ahead of time what his reaction might be. This could save you a lot of heartache. If he automatically says abortion, then he may not be the right guy for you.

Good luck sweetie.

you can't just replace jelly bean,

and you shouldn't otherwise the babies life and termination was all for nothing.

to just go and get pregnant with another baby after losing this one, don't make the same choice again or this time you will have no one e.g family or boyfriend

don't let your bubs life go to waste by trying to fill this emptyness (that cannot be filled) with a replacement.

Otherwise everything was for nothing.

you promised your baby and so now you have to live up to this promise and wait for when everything in life is perfect for it,

so that the life of the baby lost doesn't go all to waste, you promised it, so don;t do exactly what im sure your baby wouldn't want.

nothing will fill this emptyness and trying to have another out of desire to heal your pain is not the right reasons for bringing a baby into this world. no one wants to be born as a mere replacement so you dont feel so bad.

really think about it and think about what you promised, what your baby would want and be smart.

you need to use your head aswell.

take the posiitives from this pain and grow from it so the life lost wasnt in vein.

instead seek counselling to help to deal with this lose, so you can confide in others in order to grieve and eventually move on and having this baby perfcetly later in life.

the exact same thing happened to me. i was 15 and my parents were going ot kick me out my b/f didnt want to know even though we'd been together for 2 years at the time. i had an abortion and i felt exactly the same as you are now. i read up about PTS (post traumatic stress symdrom) your shoukld check that out because it helped me alot to know that what iwas feeling was normal. you will get through this even though its hard to think that now. i would recommend waiting until you feel ready to have another baby because you wont have the same feeling as you did when you were pregnant before. it took me a year to kind of get over it but just stay calm and remember the memories you have and obviously don't have another abortion because i feel that a woman can either cope with an abortion or cannot cope.

don't feel bad or as though you allowed yourself to kill someone because its not like that the situation was different you didn't willingly do it but you considered everyone elses opinions which makes you a good person anyway and talk to your b/f or close friends about it that helped me too tell him everything if you can tell how much u blame him and the horrible stuff you think because he needs to know.

hope this helps and you feel better soon.

I hate that your family and the man that helped you make that child put you in a situation. That your friends could not even support you breaks my heart. What stake did they have besides being a good friend. Were they jealous or afraid you couldnt go out as much.

Anyway. Do not get pregnant again yet. That is my opinion. It will not fill the void. Find the man that you want to have a baby with, spend the rest of your life with, and will support you no matter what. Not push you into things you don't want to do.

So very sorry this happened to you.

I could only just imagine the pain that you went through and your story gave me a heavy feeling in my chest. I am so sorry and wish I was there to give you a hug.

If you really want another baby and feel like it's the right time, go for it. Although it might be good to wait for a time where no one can push you like this again. That was extremely unfair and rather despicable of your family to put you through this despite you having objections.

Even though it will always be with you, time is a healer and I hope that you get well soon. Your family have no right to push you like this and I wish I could do more to help.

xxx

oh my goodness i never read long stories but that was so heart felt, dont worry hun i know it would have been hard because you were pressured but your time will come and you will be settled and ready... honestly abortion is one thing i could never consider but at the end of the day your heart didnt want to give jellybean away.... i personally think that you should wait abit so when your bf is ready (or you find the perfect guy for you) then you can raise your little one with both parents whole heartedly in it..... put it this way you cant turn bak now wats done is done but you can learn from this, take it easy, talk to your partner about it .. and see when he thinks he will be ready for a little one.. goodluck hun

Wow!! I am so sorry you are surrounded by monsters in your family.

I don't think you should be judged! Even though I'm 100% against abortion.

Here's my take. Get some counseling AND break up w/ your boyfriend, because someone who allows a murder to happen EVEN after seeing the heartbeat and calling it a "jelly bean" has no heart!!!

That man is not worthy of your company and NOT worthy of having any future children w/ any women and certainly NOT w/ you!

You need some time to heal physically especially so you can get pregnant again. Unfortunately i don't think you'll heal emotionally for a very long time. But don't blame yourself for it.

However, if ever you are in that situation again - please take charge, screw your family if you have to - break up w/ the man forcing you into killing a defenseless child.

You can do it without any of them. Many women, single women take charge and even if they're left out in the streets they find a way for the sake of their baby.

I'm really really sorry you've been marked like this.

I will pray for you.

But please get rid of pestilences like that that surround you.

Please don't get pregnant by that man!!

Please, for your sake and that of your future child don't!

Get counseling and give your body some time to heal. Because it's unnatural for the body to be tampered w/ like that, so the body isn't quite ready yet.

God bless!

I felt the same way and I got pregnant again. I thought that this baby would make up for what I did but truth is, it doesn't. It's a whole new human being and I'm one child short. This is something that you're going to have to learn to live with. When you have that next kid, have it with a guy that wants it, that way it would be a wonderful experience for you both.

Don't get pregnant again just to fill that emptiness. First you need help. Talk to a counselor or a therapist. Second, why would you want to be with someone that doesn't share the same feelings with you about having a child?

Wow, you need to get some counseling. Having a baby now isn't going to bring back jellybean. You should call your mom and tell her how you are feeling. She may be able to help you through this. If your mom isn't any help, call your local community health org and talk with them. They will either help you or refer you to someone who can. A lot of what is going on with you is hormones that haven't left your body yet. It is called post partum depression and can happen to you anytime you get pregnant. Please call someone today!