I have an eight year old son who refuses point blank to do school work.?

Does he have any other interests? What stimulates him most? Do you need to get him involved with a club of some sort? A team sport?

Personally, I was a naughty kid and it was all down to stimulation - I found school easy and I felt that it was below me. I also didn't play well with others.

I took up Kung Fu on a whim and with the support of my parents and really enjoyed the release it gave me and the rest fell into place.

Do you spoil him and give in easily if he wants something? If you do, this may need a change in YOUR attitude to him in order to get him to change! Shouting and smacking rarely work and aren't sustainable - similarly, making him feel inadequate by remonstrating him in front of others doesn't work either - take him to one side and have a quiet word.

My son is obsessed with football and computer games. The threat of not having either (even for a short time) is normally enough to get him to devote time to school work.

Maybe its time you took him out of the cot and put him into a bed. He is probably feeling like he's locked behind bars. Leave music on in the room & the light on and if no music a clock that ticks. This was they think someone is in the room when there not. My 2 year old has been in a Single Bed for over 1 year now and she sleeps through the night. I put her to bed with the light on & the music and then close the door then when I am ready to go to bed then I go in and turn the light off and the music off. She can still hear the clock ticking and this sounds like a heart beat to little kids. What you should also do is let him Cry for about 5 mins and if not settled then go in and settle him again and then go back out again for 5mins and keep repeating this. Eventually after about the 3rd time he will settle and fall asleep. Hope this has helped you anyway. Good luck as it's not always easy & can get you more upset than the child.

set out a very clear routine. put it on the wall.

when he gets home from school give him a drink and a snack, and DON'T allow him to sit in front of a screen, as it won't help. instead take him outside to run around and let off some steam.

after this, bring him back in and sit him down at a table (give him his own 'special' table if you can) and sit with him and say in the most positive voice you can manage 'ok (insert name here), we're going to do some homework now' make sure he knows he has no choice. sit him down at his table and go through it all with him. prais him loads for every question he answers. set up a homework chart so he has a visual aid to do it.

if homework isn't the issue then go in a speak to his teacher, and ask her/him to send any work he doesn't do in class home with him. it may be that he has real difficulty with school and needs more 1 to 1 attention to be confident enough to work. then time isnt an issue (if he doesn't do it now, he can do it at home), he might worry less. you could also make a 'i was good at schooltoday' chart and give him stickers and a prize for so many stickers at the end

if none of this helps then you could get him screened for dyslexia. that may be the problem he's having and while there's no cure, it would at least be an answer.

good luck and i hope this helps!

First of all you should never EVER give up on your child ! What you should do is seek help from a child psychologist and make it clear you dont want your child to be "diognosed" with any thing, cause then it would just lead to them giving pills or marking your child as mentally ill wich i'm sure his not . You should make it clear you just want someone to talk to him and maybe the psychologist would help you too see your son from another perspective and teach YOU a new way to talk too him .

But i think before you seek that kind of help try maybe buying super nanny´s book, if it doesen't work why not BRING super nanny to your house , you would do anuting for your child wouldn''t you ??

I mean i'm sure it is nothing that serious he is maybe just a unhappy? Maybe you guys work too much? He has no siblings so some alone time with him would really be good? But super nanny books and wathchin her shows would be very effectiant i think :)

Good luck

P.S this is her GREAT site .

http://www.supernanny.com/

You never taught your son that there are consequences to his actions. so make up a roster now so he can not complain he did not know, put it somewhere like the fridge door.

Things to put on the list are

No TV until your homework is done to my satisfaction

No Desert if you don't stack the dishwasher

get the idea?

If he lies, call him a liar and don't believe him when he tells you stuff, he has to learn that liars are treated differently. There is nothing more frustrating than telling the truth and not being believed.

Now you also have to set up a reward system to help him adapt to better behaviour. Is there somewhere he wants to go or something he really wants?

Start a reward system (can also go on the fridge) where he gets rewards for good behaviour/attitude. You could make it something like 100 'stars' equals the reward.

When he comes home ask him to tell you one bad thing that happened, and one good one. don't let him dwell on the bad, you have to make him also focus on the good.

A family therapist would be a great idea.

try some discipline...works wonders if you use it correctly. seems like you have had no practice at that.take all his things away...ground his, he goes no where except home and school. no video games, no computer, no nothing until he straightens up.dont let him be in charge, hes the child, youre the parent, you need to act like one.dont back down on whatever punishment you hand out, dont threaten, just do it. discipline never works unless it is consistent.

Lay down the law. Tell him he can't go anywhere to his school work is done to your satisfaction. Come on, you guys are older and stronger then him. It might be hard to get him to stay still the first couple times, but eventually he will get it through his head that he can't always have his way.

Well why don't you try starving the little rascal? Sure he is feisty now, but a day or two without food and you got him on the ropes! Also try beating him. A lot.

PS Do it in an basement so the neighbors don't report you.

you need to put him in his place. Disciplinary actions are needed for talking only settles soo much. He has no fear you need to put the fear into him in a good way. Unfortunatly every situation is different and requires different methods some respond to words some respond to actions. It may torture you a bit but if you got rid of anything fun for him as punishment it may help. all my ideas and good luck.

i would get him out of the habbit immediatly it could cause problems in higher grades

it may take a little while but sit down with him and help him very slowly and if you have to ask his friends parents (who's children do their homework) and ask their child do to the work with your son