Honest poem criticism? HoNeSt?

Here are some poems that I've written. I've posted some before, but here they are again. Honest criticism/feedback, please?

I'm 14 =)

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"He Left"

~

An empty stare across my face

a tear rolls down my cheek

thinking how I could erase

those words that made me weak

~

Been laying in my bed all day

hungry and deprived

my hopes and dreams have washed away

gone as if I died

~

He told me that he loved me

he'd hug me if I'd cry

and then he left me calmly

with his simple goodbye

~

I really wish I could predict

I wish that I had seen

all the pain that he'd inflict

as soon as he left me

~

Every minute was fake

every second was wrong

a mirage of a lake

a blink, and it's gone

--------------------

"Abused"

Our hearts are beating through the night

I hear them in my ears

They stutter and constrict with fright

They echo with our fears

~

Our fingertips are cold and numb

I cannot feel my toes

We'll scramble for the smallest crumb

And yet nobody knows

~

We're hiding in a basement

So cold, dark and wet

Our lives without replacement

All this we won't forget

~

One day we will be free

One day we will escape

One day people will see

One day our lives will shape

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"Saying Goodbye"

~

I hold your hands so lightly

to comfort all your fears

I whisper to you softly

and hope that you can hear

~

I know that you'll be happy

wherever you will go

I know that you'll be free

and your heart will show no woe

~

I know that you will make it

to your land of happiness

where everything that's sacred

will fill your heart with bliss

~

I'll remember what you told me

I'll remember what you said

your heart is far from empty

although it's almost dead

~

And now I say goodbye

because it's time for you to go

but you'll never truly die

because my heart will always know

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"Whenever you cry"

~

I linger silently

unable to speak

It ended so violently

and I was too weak

~

Although I am dead

I will not go away

your hearts have long bled

but that ends today

~

It's time to move on

It's time now to heal

you've suffered too long

and that I can feel

~

Although you don't know it

you can hear my voice

your actions will show it

you'll make the right choice

~

So now I am free

So now I can fly

but here I will be

whenever you cry

--------------------

"Their Son"

~

He cries, he wails

there's nothing I can do

as an organ fails

my face goes greenish-blue

~

He turns towards me

his eyes so scared

I want to flee

I'm unprepared

~

I take his hand

and hold it tight

and know I can't

erase his fright

~

I'm not his mom

I'm not his dad

but they're long gone

his heart they stabbed

~

They just left

they ran away

while their son slept

he was betrayed

~

And now he's sick

and now he's crying

the seconds tick

their son is dying

~

He smiles at me

his eyes close

and I know that he

died of a broken heart

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Alot of people suggested that I write about happier things. I took their advice, and I tried. Here are my attempts:

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"Flint"

~

The corners lift

white bones show

everything shifts

with a special glow

~

A muscle twitch

a painkiller

a flick of a switch

a heart stealer

~

Used to show feeling

expresses devotion

often revealing

your deepest emotions

~

Say so much

with individual glint

a silent touch

your personal flint

~

Smile.

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

"Claws of the Beast"

~

Glimmering

beyond sight

shimmering

reflection of light

~

The blues bounce off the grays

and the whites off the greens

the sun's brilliant rays

fall forever in beams

~

The claws of the beast

the horrific beauty

crave a bloody feast

move wild and freely

~

Love and hate

cold or warm

decides your fate

just a windy storm

~

The ocean.

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People also suggested that I try to write without rhyme. I tried. I don't like it really, but here it is:

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"My Words"

~

I can hear the rain

sitting on my bed

it's dark outside

people are sleeping

~

I tell them all my feelings

my pencil and my notebook

because they always listen

they never interrupt

~

The graphite on the paper

makes words

sometimes they rhyme

it's beautiful

~

I'm afraid to show people

my words

they might take them

and lie

~

But I show some people

and I'm glad

they say my words

are beautiful

~

The rain has stopped

I hear the crickets

I close my eyes

and sleep

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Thanks for reading! Criticism/comments/suggestions/feedback/favorites? Thanks!

=) =) =)