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What are your views on Treating children with meds for ADD/ADHD?
I have a 7 year old boy who is very active, cant stay focused and just failed the first grade by being 2 points short in reading. He passed his CRCT test ( test to determine their skills, etc) I feel like the teacher failed him on purpose.
Ever since prek my sons teachers have suggested he may have one of these disorders. I dont believe in these meds. I am terrified of giving my son meds that have killed children. On the other hand i know the kids who actually have this it helps a lot. Its just from all my research i have concluded its way over diagnosed and that schools mainly recommend it these days because they get more money to have children with these issues from the government and some parents can collect from government as well so they drug their perfectly healthy kids.
His teacher this year called me all the time, emailed me and constantly asked what i was doing about his problem. We tried several things at home, diet changes, all natural vitamin -calm child, and nothing please her. I have always feared talking to a doctor about it but he is getting very much out of control. He is acting out in several ways, he shows no respect, breaks and destroys almost everything, talks back etc. Now i know its all about how you raise your children and i assure you he has been raised with nothin but respect and manners. Its just over the last 2-3 years its slowly getting worse.
My family and I always said hes a little boy, thats how they are, but now we are all seeing this change and its really hurting his self esteem. He never gets your doing great at school. they constantly make him feel like hes not doing his best. We spent so much time working with him, sending him morning and afternoon tuturial and still they failed him. He didnt get to play sports or have any fun because of the amount of school work they sent him home with. He is begging me to change his school and hes so upset all his friends are moving on and hes not.
My question is what do you think i should do. I am finally going to take him to the doctor but i am going to express to them that i dont want him on meds unless they firmly believe that this is the problem. I would also want the lowest dose possible. What are your veiws and opinions. I want whats best for him and his future. I dont want to be the reason he doesnt feel good about himself, Also i dont know if this has anything to do with it but he also has a bedwetting problem and doctors have always said he will grow out of it but i think its getting worse and he sometimes has accidents during the day.
Thanks for all advice ahead of time!!! Please dont be rude i am simply asking for your story or opinions.
13 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
I have a son who turned 7 yesterday! His story is very much like your son's only he didn't fail the first grade. I believe that is only because his teacher was afraid that she would get stuck with him again. I had a LONG, HARD year with him, but I learned alot. First of all (it's a state law here so check your local laws) teachers are NOT allowed to tell you that your son has add/adhd or any other disease or disorder. They are simply allowed to tell you of the problems he is having and maybe even suggest some things to help him. The DR will probably give you a survey to fill out and one for the teacher, If you have an option let his new teacher do it and not the one that failed him. My son's teacher got so bad that she told me to buy him shoes without laces because my son tied his shoes too much and refused to give him pencils because he also has sensory issues that caused him to press harder then normal, so the tips broke. I could go on and on but I don't want to bore you with the details. I will sum it up to say that it seems to me that it became her personal mission to kill my son's self esteem. Which I will tell you sadly she did successfully.
When I took my son to the DR I was very specific that meds was a very last resort. So he went thru some testing with a team of therapist and they came up with a plan. He will start Behavioral therapy in 2 weeks and then differant sorts from there as needed. You might want to see what you can do along those lines. It seems to me that my son responded very well to an extra "good job Jr" or a high-five every once in a while instead of the constant put downs he was getting at school.
Most importantly buy a spiral book, send it with him to school everyday. Ask the teacher to take just a minute out of her time at the end of the day to tell you how your son did that day. Make sure this teacher understands that you would like to know the good and bad! Respond to her, ask her questions, give her little things that you may have tried to help him, just make sure that you are on the same page. I did this because she was supposedly trying differant things with my son and nothing worked. But once this notebook came into play there was no proof of her trying anything, even after I got the paperwork from his therapist with things that he NEEDED! So now when I try to sue the school I have all the proof that I need. She punished him and made him write on his lunch break and everything. But even the therapist suggest trying behavior charts, chore charts, reward systems and what they call "when, then" or "if , then" charts. We have been dealing with my son unmedicated for almost a year, and it is a long hard road but it is worth it. I have heard about kids turning into "zombies" on medication. I personally am not willing to take that chance until EVERY other possiblity has been exhausted. Hang in there and if you need to chat feel free to contact me!
- beetlemilkLv 71 decade ago
Firstly, it is a violation for a teacher who cannot diagnose to suggest your child has any disorder and I would remind anyone saying as such.
There are many less invasive strategies to try. Does he have a behavior plan? If he doesn't have an IEP, ask for one, or for a 504 accommodation. Strategies: A corral around his desk? Preferential seating? Pre-teaching? Breaks including lots of heavy work and movement? An OT to work on sensory integration. Incentive to finish accurately ex. IF you do this, then you will get...? Can he wear a brimmed hat (to avoid U/V light in the class)?
Have you considered having him repeat the grade? He is to repeat? That can be good.
Do you have this book:
"The Myth of A.D.D" by Armstrong
lots of strategies to help increase attention
If his inattention is affecting the family dynamic, his self-esteem, then its time to consider meds. Dosages are titrated up so they begin with the lowest dose possible and increase until effective.
I am seeing the best results with kids at this age with this issue with Vyvanese. Suggest reading about Vyvanese and some other common ones like Focalin, ritalin, adderral, concerta, strattera, clonidine.
When you take him to a doctor, make sure its a specialist. Suggest a pediatric neurologist.
Suggest increasing the fun.
Agree with Tina
A communication book is a good idea, we use a composition book.
Agree with xxblood
Vyvanese is a good choice. Also look into CAPD (central auditory processing disorder) with an audiologist
After seeing the neuro, get a second opinion before deciding meds are the route to go.
Do make sure that any consequences that he has in school do not take away from any amount of his recess time. He needs that.
http://www.optometrists.org/blackburn/vision_quiz....
See a qualifed eyedoctor, he may have appropriate vision but not have appropriate focusing of eyeteaming issues.
Get Irlen filters:
http://irlen.com/index.php?id=131
He should be seeing a reading specialist at school
Source(s): pysch nurse My brother took adderral for 3 years as a child, college grad. No meds. Meds from 7-10 My son is 8, has an ADD dx, did repeat first grade, has a behavior plan and many strategies to help, is not yet medicated - Anonymous1 decade ago
I'm not a big fan of the drugs. I think they are handed out too commonly and easily these days. I see you seem to understand the issues though... I generally feel the same way as you do I think. It's a tough call. I think if it were my child I might consider an alternate school. Maybe he needs something hands on? They have schools that have just as good educations (if not better at times.. especially in the sciences from what I've seen) but they are in a different setting or have a different learning method. They prepare them for middle school (any reputable one I mean.. you have to watch out for anything flakey) ... it might help to give him an outlet right now. Honestly, I think he might be 7. I don't know your child obviously.. I am just trying to share some of the options I might see if this were my child. I would look into possible alternative schools that would prepare him just as well but possibly stronger in math and science (most schools are lacking these days in those subjects). I might try to get him tutors and extra help. My fear would be that putting him on this would be a long-term thing. I know how different some kids act on it. I remember the kids in the school that took them.. you could tell when they were on and off of them. & when we reached high school most were depressed and felt like they had to take pills to be normal and ended up skipping the pills, doing worse at school and selling their drugs to other students. I think it's just a bad system. If your child is different then some I think the BEST thing to do is to help them understand their differences and know how to cope and manage in the world with them. Covering the problem up with drugs will be a band-aid.. and deep down as they get older they will see that they need the drugs to succeed rather than being able to do it on their own.
Again, just my thoughts and concerns on it. I sincerely hope you guys figure something out! I'm sure you're having a hard time managing your options right now.. hope I didn't confuse you more. Good luck with it. I wish you and your son very well! ♥
- MousieBabyLv 41 decade ago
I am sorry you are having to try and make such a hard decision. I was thinking before I read the whole post that I would say that medicating children for add/adhd is just plain wrong. Kids are kids and they get hyper and have short attention spans at times. This doesn't mean they need pills. If your son has a legitimate problem though, it would be wrong as well not to get him the medical treatment he needs. I suppose that if it were my daughter who was having your son's problems I would be just as apprehensive about making a decision. If he is diagnosed as ADD/ADHD you could try the medication and see if it helps him. It's scary stuff. I am still up in the air about vaccines and this swine flu thing is pretty scary too. Modern medicine is both a blessing and a curse. You just have to pick and choose what is right for you and your son. I wish you all the best.
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- ?Lv 45 years ago
My son had ADHD and my daughter had ADD. My son was more active than would be considered normal. He did not listen to what I would say and would usually do the opposite. He was easily upset and actually sensitive to sensory things (which may play a part in the attention problem). He could not sit at the dinner table and would be up and down, constantly. He was sometimes silly and at other times he would be angry for no apparant reason. He would do part of his schoolwork, but sometimes skip lines on his papers. He would (laugh now) study with me and he would be upside-down on the bed, and rolling all over - I could not concentrate. He did not sleep well. My daughter did what your daughter is doing, and this started in first grade. I did not think she was overly social, but in school, the teacher said she was always visiting. Later, in school, the teachers would say she was not getting her work done. She apparantly looked like she was working, but the work never got done. The teacher never seemed to understand what was happening. I later found out that my son had "food sensitivities" which I had tests run for. Different foods would affect him in different ways. Some would make him active and inattentive. Others would make him moody and angry. Sugar would make him more silly, than normal. You can see why many ADHD children are thrown in the class as bipolar. Many medications, little results, although many side effects. You can look these things up as: ADHD and candida ADHD and food sensitivities ADHD and leaky gut Alcat test Books: "Gut Solutions", "Allergies and the Hyperactive Child" - Dr. Doris Rapp (wonderful book) - used booksites because it is out-of-print. Read it cover-to-cover. Oh, the doctors will not agree with any of the "food" connections, so you may as well not try to get their agreement on this.
- jamiLv 41 decade ago
I understand where your fear comes from, you don't want to hurt or risk your child's life by giving him the meds.
So by respecting your decision on that i think you should still go to the doctor, only to be sure that he does have ADD/ADHD. After you know you may find some other diets or programs that he can try before the meds.
But if he is only 7 and getting worse and failing i think you need to do something. If only to help him be able to function as he gets older.
Good luck with your decision, it is only one you can make.
Source(s): Parent - tannerLv 71 decade ago
I think that teachers don't want to deal with hyper kids so they want them drugged to make their job easier, which is not fair to the child. Children do get hyper, children are immature, that's why they're children - not adults. And I believe that ADD/ADHD is over diagnosed. Parents as well as teachers find medicating children a way out of having to deal with a discipline problem. I understand that there may be cases when a child Truly does have a problem & need help by being medicated, but in most cases I find it to be unnecessary. I have a hyper child, he is passing in school, but he does get out of control, but I would not ever medicate him because I don't really believe in it, he will learn to control himself & grow out of this hyperness. It's not hurting anyone & he's learning, so why drug him? So he may be told to quiet down or pay attention in class a few extra times, big deal. Teachers need to learn how to deal with children & their different personalities, not just want them to sit there like a statue. A co-worker of mine has one of her children on medication for ADHD. The teacher complained that he was acting up too much in classes & that his meds weren't working etc. So the doc upped his meds & the poor boy acted like a zombie, he was out of it, & wasn't learning very well. My co-worker was so mad at that teacher, she just wanted her son to sit there & do nothing, & in turn it caused more damage than it did help. And when the mom talked to the teacher about him being zombie like, the teacher just said oh no the medicine is working well he's being so good in class, everything is fine. Yea! He was being good in class because he was zoned out! The teacher jumped right on telling the parent when her son acted up, but when her son acted like a zombie she didn't say a word... want to know why...cause it made her job easy, she didn't have to deal with him. Her job is to teach children, not judge their personalities.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
here's how i see it. some parent's don't want to discipline their kids so the kids act out then don't know any better. the parents cry add and put them on meds. meds to focus, to wake up, to go to sleep... it's kind of sick.
then there are kids with legitimate problems. their bodies react differently to some things than other kids bodies, and it makes them hyper and hard to focus. these kids parents see other kids being given ridiculous prescriptions so decide to skip meds the child would actually benefit from.
take him to be evaluated. if they recommend meds, i'd at least give it a go. if he dosen't like them or you decide with the meds he's not improving, try an alternative route.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Lady im 12 and i have auditory processing dissorder, adhd add partial dyslexia. Let me tell you that i am on 70 mg of vivanse for adhd and it helps me alot. My grades have gone fron c's to a's. And you will find it much more easy to control your boys because theyr problems are not controllable and medicting them is the best solution. It will not change anything but what its supposed to. Even if your not sur you believe in medicine visit a child psychologist and talk about different solutions and diagnosis. Its perfectly normal and it helps trust me i have problems but with my medication it can be solved. For the sake of your childrens future try visiting a psychologist.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
I have a nephew with very bad autism that would kill small animals and beat smaller children with whatever hard object he could grab. He cut me in my sleep once and then poured a bag of trash on me...complete with used maxi pads and soiled TP. When I woke up he was standing over me with the knife laughing. This was at 4 years old. He is now very medicated and doing better...I wouldn't say well.