Arghhhh! 16-year-old daughter thinks I'm a worry-wart. Am I?

When I decided to join YA, it was with solemn promises to my family not to do anything that would reveal my identity. The reason for this was because we had been through a two year nightmare with one of my daughters that began when a stalker became obsessed with her online. What is important for your daughter to realize about going online with anything that could conceivably expose your identity is that when someone like this becomes obsessed with you, it occupies their every waking moment. They will go to any lengths to get to you. They devote their lives to it, and they are dangerous. My daughter survived it, but many don't. It is so hard to keep things in balance these days, since there are very real dangers to our kids that didn't exist pre-internet.

I think that anything you can provide to help her to both develop and listen to her instincts is the best way to handle it. If you've given her the tools you can, and trust that you've raised her to possess the maturity and good sense to make use of them, that's all you can do. Things like cell phones have done wonders to keep my daughters safe by giving them immediate access to us for help when their cars broke down or tires went flat out on the roads, or they found themselves in situations that were going south. They need to have the freedom to live their lives, and the tools to do it as safely as possible. I've always felt that part of the reason for my daughter's nightmare was because she is the youngest, and maybe we didn't focus on teaching her as well. She wasn't as savvy about her activities online as she needed to be. But she learned quite a bit through that experience and lived to tell about it, although it isn't her favorite subject. I have 3 daughters, and they have now told me about some of the things they used to do that I never had a clue about and that would make your hair stand on end......and somehow they all managed to grow up to live happily ever after (knock on wood).

P.S. My daughters always accused me of being an overprotective worry wart, blah blah blah. While they did find ways to do dangerous things, I think my worries got implanted into their heads enough to have kept them safer even when they made stupid choices.

At the end of the day, the internet is no more or less dangerous than the real world. It's the same people who reside in both cyberspace and our day-to-day lives. The only difference is anonymity.

Watch your back when walking down the street. And don’t be an idiot behind the computer screen either.

My rule is simple. Never type your phone number or address to someone who you have just met online.

My 14 year-old can't go without transportation. And my 17 year-old SON tells us where he is going and when to expect him back. And he frequently gets calls to check his location (Not on purpose, but it seems I always have to ask him about something.)

That is some advice. I don't think I have enough information to know if your are a worry-wart.

You are not crazy. You do have to let her live her life with your advisement and hope that her choices will be right. No one can ever be one hundred percent safe in this world. I wish you all of the luck in the future and yes it does just get different. I have four children of my own.

Noone is TOO SMART to not make mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes... More as teens. Your daughter (just like any one else) can be caught by a predator or a cyber-predator. Noone is safe. You are a Mother and that's what they do... WORRY!

you're not crazy. She's naive. I don't think anything you tell her will change that. Experience will change her, as bad things large and small (hopefully mostly small) happen to her. Try to do practical things like make sure her car is safe, and that she knows she can come to you if she is ever pregnant, raped, whatever.

well my daughter is soon to be 4 and im always worrying about her safety as well as her twin brother's. well i think when she is 16 im going to be worrying about the same thing. there are sick people out there and our kids just have to be prepared!

Your not a worry wart...

Just i mean....She's not 3 anymore. I'm sure she can go outside without someone just coming and snatching here. They teach them things like that at school.

idk what to say really. I mean, i'm 17, and i don't even live with my mom. But, she knows that im in no harm...Idk. I think she will be fine.