My wife complains she has no friends, but does nothing about it. What can I do?

I don't see why this is your problem. Do whatever makes you happy and recognize that she is an adult woman who is responsible for her own happiness. Keep inviting her in case she ever wants to go along, but if you leave her at home because it's her choice to stay there, don't let it trouble you.

It does sound like she has some sort of depression going on. She might not be able to actually go out with these friends because she's afraid she might do something wrong, or say something wrong, and alienate those friends for life. It sounds like there's major self-abuse going on there.

Get her some help, have her talk to someone about why she doesn't/can't go out and make new friends, or keep the ones she has. But always, always, always be supportive. If she is suffering from depression, the worst thing you can do is dismiss it as just a womans nagging.

I'm the exact same way as your wife. I always say I want friends but I just don't have any luck making what I consider "true friends" I have all the intentions in the world to make friends and go out and find a hobby. I have tried going to the little candle parties for co workers, I've tried going out with the single co workers, I've tried play groups with other Mothers. I feel so uncomfortable in all of these circles. I love entertaining people at my home but I never invite anyone. I don't really have a good suggestion for you because I have no idea what to do myself. I just wanted you to know that she isn't the only person like that. Good luck to you. Hang in there....

It sounds a bit like my wife. My suggestion is to involve her in some women's groups (my wife is in Red Hats .. for those over 50) or when you go to church or synagogue engage others in the women's groups so that they invite her to things while you're in the men's club. Visit a charity and see if you can do things together with her and that the wives of other members will engage her and she'll be flattered by them and want to be with them. Even to the point of making friends with the wives to exchange pleasantries and time together.

If your wife isn't the joining-in kind then attempt to do other things as a couple .. and perhaps her shell will become thinner and she'll have more self-confidence (which apparently she lacks now) and find herself.

You're correct .. 40 is indeed too young to be on the sidelines and watch life pass you by. .. We're in our 60's .. and engaged in life's doings.

has she never had any friends? where are all her past acquaintances? i moved to a new city not too long ago and i have no close friends. while i wish i had someone to hang with, i really wish i just had my old friends. it does take a lot of effort to make friends, so maybe she just doesnt want to put the effort in.

are you sure she is saying that she wants new friends? sayign that she wish she had a friend like yours doesnt mean she wants a new friend. it just means she wish she had that relationship.

she sounds like she may be a little depressed tho. have you thought about counseling at all?

I don't think it's something you need to worry your pretty little head about!

You could get out there and make couple friends though. DON'T go alone if she doesn't go! Invite a buddy and his wife to dinner, to a game, to a movie. I don't think she needs to be lectured on how to make a friend. It will happen in good time.

When my mum divorced my dad, my dad turned all of my mums friends against her. Now, she doesn't openly admit she had no friends, but she has very few, and i kind of feel sorry for her.

But i must admit she has started to make an effort, like shes started to invite people round, and if your wife wants friends she should do the same thing i guess. x

Sounds like serious clinical depression, plus social phobia. Have her tested in a mental health clinic for anxiety disorders, emotional diso5rders and bahvioral disorders. She might need therapy and or medication.

Sounds like your wife has clinical depression. She should see her doctor and bring this up.

My wife is the SAME way...I've even encouraged her to have an affair so we at least have something to discuss.

(Notice the "it's all about me" tone here...)