Christmas Party Etiquette?

I can totally see why you don't want a TV on in the living room/party area. I would suggest either removing it to your bedroom or if it's too big, unplug it and tape a small "out of order" sign on it.

As far as her disappearing to the basement....who cares? She is a pain in the rear anyways...let her disappear and just pretend she didn't show up. That is a win-win, right?

If she complains about the food and wants something ordered for her, I'd simply say, "I'm sorry you didn't find something that appeals to you. I'd be happy to get you a phone book if you'd like to order something for yourself." And let her take care of it and pay.

She's rude - but you're going to play the "good hostess" role (within reason) and don't let her foul attitude ruin the party. You just have to adjust your expectations a bit. Don't be surprised when the gorilla eats bananas if you know what I mean. :-)

Have a great party!

ETA: I am starting to get the feeling that you are someone who demands all the attention and doesn't really want to "solve" this problem. As EVERYONE has said, just let her hide downstairs. A simple shout-out down the stairs for dinner if she wants to join will suffice. If she misses elements of the party, so be it. It will reflect on her, not you. Just let it go already!!!!!!

Whoa, does she have and kids? Because she might be my mom. JK my mom is not that bad. I do have relatives. especially the men, who think they can come to my home and watch what they want to watch. i un plug the TV, and i put a decoration on the Screen. If they don't get the Hint then they have had way to much Eggnog.

As for her being rude and huffing and puffing in your home, that is totally unacceptable, and its something that your husband might need to talk to her about, or the other members in your family. Odds are the family is turning a blind eye to her rude behavior. If she does not like your food, drinks, decoration, company, kill her with kindness. Let her know how sorry you are that she is not having a good time and everyone else is. Then ignore her.

Wow interesting question, aren't the holidays fun?

Oh boy....I guess there's one in every family, huh?

Since you seem to know her typical behavior, honestly I would just ignore that kind of childishness. If she has a problem with the food, you can make her a few peanut butter and jelly sandwiches :-) If she is going to act childish then you can treat her like a child :-) Okay I am just kidding (although that would be hilarious).

In all seriousness, if she does choose to go downstairs, I would just ignore it. Maybe she gets overwhelmed with all of the social stimulation, you never know. Or maybe she's just downright bored.

I think you can still have a nice time, I would be genuinely nice to her and try to be as understanding as you can.

Good luck with that :-)

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I'm not sure what the problem is... Bottom line, she's weird and difficult. Let her hang out by herself downstairs and don't include her in any of the festivities upstairs. Problem solved.

I hate having to hand hold people like your sister in law. If she feels like going downstairs and ordering a pizza, let her. At least you won't have to deal with "...hours of her eye rolls and sighs and complaints about EVERYTHING." as you say.

clean off the couch down there! BE that good hostess!

Unless you want to totally alienate her. In this case you would turn the entire area into storage but leave only not enough room for her to watch television. If she chooses to stay down there, she will wallow in her own misery.

You arte prepared, invite her, and if she wants to skulk around watching TV instead of being part of the party let her. It is her loss not yours. Also her complaining about food will not reflect on you as all the family are aware of her ways.

I'd send her to the basement to watch TV...Problem solved. Maybe even pick up a few movies for her to watch.

Maybe she has anxiety issues or something and doesn't really want to be there. Ignore her as best you can.