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What did the atheist say when he got to heaven?

Well, I'll be damned.

hehe, just a joke chill out.

22 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    yes its' a joke.

    we all know where atheists will go in the afterlife

    CHOOSE JESUS

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.

    He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.

    After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight.

    When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.

    When he was close enough, he called out, 'Excuse me, where are we?'

    'This is Heaven, sir,' the man answered. 'Wow! Would you happen to have some water?' the man asked.

    Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up.'The man gestured, and the gate began to open.

    'Can my friend,' gesturing toward his dog, 'come in, too?' the traveller asked.

    'I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets.'

    The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.

    After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence.

    As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

    'Excuse me!' he called to the man. 'Do you have any water?'

    'Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in.'

    'How about my friend here?' the traveller gestured to the dog.

    'There should be a bowl by the pump.'

    They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it.

    The traveller filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog.

    When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree.

    'What do you call this place?' the traveller asked.

    'This is Heaven,' he answered.

    'Well, that's confusing,' the traveller said. 'The man down the road said that was Heaven, too.'

    'Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell.'

    'Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?'

    'No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind.'

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    10 points Slytherin.

    I'm in a generous mood.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Probably the same thing a christians says when he doesn't get into Valhalla.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Really now. I thought you people believe that all atheists are going to hell, but here you are admitting that at least one of them is going to heaven.

    Open mouth, insert foot.

  • 1 decade ago
  • 1 decade ago

    hmm... i guess many religious people were wrong... people can get into heaven even if they don't believe in god ^.^

    that would be funny

    Source(s): atheist
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Hehehehe - next?

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Why did the Devil make me a jackass on Earth?

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    "Nice place you've got here...though it seems a bit too...chirpy"

    Edit:

    I just got the punchline lol...

    Im a bit slow today :)

    Source(s): Atheist
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