Who is right? My daughter or I?

It is your money so it doesn't matter what she wants, if it's against your principles you are right. I would let her know that if she stays in the dorms like her older sister that you will be happy to pay for it.

You don't have to give her any help, let her know it is a gift that you can give or not.

You should pay for HALF of your daughters room, and tell her that if she want's a boy there, they will have to pay the other half of the room and there own groceries.

send them a check for the same amount every month and don't ever send them emergency money unless it's a real emergency.

She probably should not be taking a boyfriend with her to college...that's a sure way to see trouble, but she is going to have to live and learn.

It's probably for the best that you sell your house and move into a smaller one without her old room too...That way her and her boyfriend can't move back in with you when play time is over.

She can pay for it herself. Unless she's living with you while at college though, she'll just have to go into the dorms. Most colleges require students to be in the dorms for at least 2-3 years unless they live within 10-20 miles of the campus WITH THEIR PARENTS.

Tell her to act like an adult and you'll treat her like one.

The person who pays is right. If she wants her boyfriend to be her roommate and he isn't a college student, then why doesn't he have a job to pay rent? She is essentially asking you to pay for her to shack up with some freeloader. She is not allowing you to treat her equally, she is asking for too much. She is asking you to allow a grown man to mooch off of you while he is screwing her. She should be demanding that he pay for room and board if he wants to live with her. What kind of man wants to live with his girlfriend and have her mother pay for it? A lazy man she will be taking care of in the future, while you take care of him in the present. I can't even believe that you thought you were wrong. If she wants to live with him, he should be the one paying period. This situation is totally different than the one with your oldest daughter. The second they decided they wanted to live together they should have come up with a plan to make that happen without having you pay for it. She is being unreasonable and trying to guilt trip you. She should be asking her boyfriend to be a man and handle his business. I can just hear him, "Man I live with my girl, don't have to work or go to school and her mom is paying for it. Yeah I know dude, sweet."

You're in the right. You're the one who's paying for the apartment, so you have a say in who lives there. Just like with any other roommate.

When she pays, she decides.

You

Tell her that you dont mind her living with the BF ( lie)

but she gets the same deal as her sister, you pay for the dorm, not off campus housing with a roomate

thats equal

THE BF IS A LOSER BTW, you can tell her I said so

Neither one of you is technically right. However you have to see it from her point. I do agree that it wouldn't be fair to pay for one child to stay in dorm but not the other. She is old enough to be living with her boyfriend in the dorm, and would you object to paying if it were anyone else?

You are.

If he's not a college student then he shouldn't be staying with her! Can't you pay a single dorm for her? You know, the ones that are only for one person.

You are right. Always be a parent first, a friend second. There are no rules that you have to treat both of your children equally, because I'm sure she likes to be unique from her sister.

you are 100% correct, but if she insists on him living with her, then maybe he or she should get a job and pay the difference, the way i see it is, if she is old enough to live with a boyfriend, then she/he should take on the financial responsibility,

Im on your side you are right, dont pay for him to live with her, he need to get a job and pay his own way, or she needs to get a job and pay for his way,