Who likes this version of Christmas song I came up with?

This is short version.

On Twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me

Twelve issues of a parenting magazine

Eleven bassinets

Ten dozen roses

Nine baby showers instead of seven

Eight in-laws coming to dinner

Seven baby booties

Six minutes of Ecstasy

Five hours to get ready

Four country Cd's

Three well placed noogies

Two kisses on the cheek

And one covered up hickey