My wife is pregnant with another mans baby?

What she has done to you is f*cking cruel. The only positive is that she at least had half a decency to tell you before it was born. Many women actually carry the lie on for years, decades even...some poor buggers never know the truth.

I suggest you leave her. when the baby is born get a dna test. If its yours, step up and help take care of it. Apply for access/ visitation or joint custody and pay your child support.

If its not yours and you have no other children, you can divorce and move on without ever having to see her ever again.

EDIT: Perhaps you should email this guy. Many of his answers involve information about men in your situation. He may be able to point you in the direction of resources you could use.

http://au.answers.yahoo.com/my/profile;_ylt=AiqcVS...

What else is going on? I've heard of women doing this to prove a point or have a baby because the husband won't give them one .Were you really in the dark about her affair and genuinely thought that the baby(given the timing and everything) was really yours? Is she expecting you to stay with her? Where is the other guy? Is he still around? relationships are complicated. Would you stay with her if she had only cheated or is the baby the deal breaker? She may not want to stay you. Don't try to work it out and she has other ideas.

You'll have to determine whether or not the child is yours.

Apart from that, you'll have to decide what you want to do with the fact that your wife has admitted she's been unfaithful.

Perhaps working with a good therapist might be a good idea right now.

For the sake of the baby, your wife does need to regulate her stress level. That might not feel like a *fair* thing to YOU right now -- but the child is the innocent one, and he or she is just trying to get a start at being alive. You know?

You're in a tough spot. Hang in there, Guy.

xoxoxoxoxoxo

You can ask her to get an amniocentesis done (soon, it's usually done around 16-18 weeks) and determine paternity now, or wait until the baby is born and get a DNA test.

Your name will be placed on the birth certificate since you'll be married at the child's birth, but if testing determines that the child isn't yours you can get your name removed.

Personally, I could absolutely not stay with someone who was not only unfaithful but then got pregnant. PLUS she risked giving you an STD by sleeping with you at the same time she was whoring around and clearly DID NOT use a condom with you or the other man!! Absolutely disgusting!

I actually have a friend that went through this. He stayed with his wife, and in his case, the child was not his, but he loves it as it is his own. That was nearly ten years ago, and it was hard for them at the time, but they managed to work through their differences and move on together as a family. I guess it depends how you see things. You did not mention if there are any other children involved. If you love your wife and you still want her, forgive her, and raise the child as your own regardless of who is actually the real father. I was adopted at two weeks old. My father was the most wonderful man in the world, and I was so lucky to be put in his hands as a baby. His love for me was unconditional. Have you spoken with your wife? What does she want? Will she be faithful in the future? These are all important questions that you need to work out with her before you decide how to handle this. Communicate with her, then make your decision from there. Good luck.

You have to decide that for yourself. She did confess her affair to you, and you would be right to forgive her. If she isn't cheating now, and does not again, you can choose to move past this. Yes, cheating is a valid reason to leave, but it doesn't mean you have to. She did confess, and that is a HUGE step in the right direction. For the baby, wait until it gets here, and then, if it matters to you, you can test to see it it's yours. If you want to save your marriage, that won't matter so much, except for any medical issues later down the road.

Only you know if you believe she's really sorry for what she did, and only you can decide to move past this. No matter what you decide, forgiving her is still the right thing. Hope this helps, and really sorry that you have to go through this. It isn't right, and it hurts. Not something I would ever do to my husband, but people make mistakes. Use your best judgment.

Here is my two cents...

Have a talk with her to find out what she wants and what she doesn't want. See if you two can mend things. Good time to see a marriage counselor, always nice to have an unbiased opinion

If you two can mend things, then I recommend not doing the paternal test, it only complicates things. Love him/her unconditional.

If you two can't mend things, then you know what to do and get a paternal test.

Sometimes things get really complicated and you have to do what will make you and the baby happy. You will still love your wife no matter what the outcome is, but staying together is different. Unconditional love is hard, but not impossible.

You need to make a plan for yourself. First, plan a paternity test to make sure it is or is not yours. Then ask yourself a few questions. Can you forgive her since she cheated? Are you willing to take care of another man's child? What if the other man wants to be in the child's life? If it is your child, are you willing to stay with her because of it? What if she cheats again?

It is possible to be a very good and involved parent without marrying your child's mother. Good luck with whatever you choose.

MANY PEOPLE CAN ADVISE YOU BUT THE ONLY WAY YOU WILL KNOW WHAT TO DO IS WHEN YOU TALK TO HER AND FIND OUT WHY? HOW? WHEN? WHO?

ALL THESE DETAILS ARE IMPORTANT...

IF SHE WAS BORED... OR WAS SHE LONELY ... THESE ARE 2 VERY DIFF REASONS

IF YOUR RELATIONSHIP AND LOVE IS STONG IT CAN USRVIVE THIS BUT ONLY WHEN YOU KNOW THE DETAILS CAN YOU UNDERSTAND YOUR OWN FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS...

AND THIS CAN ONLY BE DONE BY CHATTING TO YOUR WIFE...

FIND OUT WHO'S THE BABY IS 1ST...

THEN LET HER EXPLAIN... AS HER QUESTIONS...

ONLY THEN WILL YOU BE ABLE TO KNWO AND DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT TO DO...

WHETHER YOU WANT TO GIVE IT AGO WITH HER AND TRUST HER TO LEAVE THE AFFAIRE BEHIND HER... WITH THE BABY OR WITHOUT THE BABY.. YOU WILL HAVE TO DECIDE

OR YOU WANT TO END IT...

ITS IMPORTANT TO COMMUNICATE WITH HER...

HER FEELINGS ARE IMPORTANT..OFCOURSE OF SHE FEELS NO GUILT THEN DUMP HER, BUT IF SHE HAS CONFESSED.. SHE MUST HAVE FELT SOMETHIGN TOWRADS YOU..

TALK AOUT WHY AND HOW UR MARRIAGE HAS GONE LIKE THIS...

COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY

Dude, I am so sorry for you. This sucks. But you do have to get a grip and maintain. Keep hold of your emotions and think. Get legal advice, NOW for a real lawyer. Dump Her. Get a confession of her admitting this in writing, on tape, on video or infront of the church congregation. Do what you have to do but get it all nice and legal. Insist upon a paternity test. Why? Because unless you can prove the kid is not yours, no matter whether you stay with her or not, the law will assume the kid is yours unless you prove otherwise. And there often is a time limit on how long you have to prove this or challenge paternity too, so waiting will not help you out any.

Be prepaired for her to do anything, say anything, whatever, to try to get you okay and calm and willing to work with her. Beware that it is a set up and a play to help herself out in this spot and legally. Your mission is to watch out for and to protect you and only you right now. I do not care if your Mom says you should try to work it out. Yes, you can try to do so, but just make sure that you have protected yourself legally too. And by no means, NO MEANS, are you to have sex with herl. That is considered as forgiveness of her.