can he take everything?

WOW - he is playing you BIG TIME. I'm not sure --- if you went to his house and he owned it before marriage - you are entitled to 1/2 but probably won't be able to stay there. If you bought it together after you married - you have a chance of keeping the house and giving him 1/2 - or selling it and splitting it. If it's a rental and in his name - it's possible he can keep it. If he is working or worked most of the time of the marriage he WILL NOT get alimony. He can't have your stuff either - it may go to a mediator but if you bought it BEFORE you got married - you get to keep most of it. You need to contact an attorney and I mean NOW. You MUST keep proof that you pay the bills. He's trying to prevent you from seeing an attorney by scaring you into what you might loose. Don't be. You have yourself and your kids and he'll soon be out of your life. . . .good luck.

Probably... the higher income is punished.

Welcome to what it feels like to be a man! You do all the work and take care of things and your reward is that BECAUSE you did more (probably the reason for the divorce) YOU have to pay... and usually for life!

I think we need to do away with alimony and such. It's a very flawed system.

I know that my wife and I are on the edge of divorce so I made sure that she will have to pay me. I made 80+% of all the money in our 25 years... I do most of the housework... I built this house with my own hands... I will be damned if she will take it from me!

I have what I call the 'avalanche' theory. I set up a set of circumstances whereby all of the bad things that I COULD do, are just sitting. The only thing that holds them up and keeps those bad things from happening is the good behavior of the other person. I don't have to do one thing to make it all collapse and crush them... all they have to do is treat me fairly. In the event that they 'kick the stick', they will bring everything upon them. Most people CANNOT walk away from the stick... even when they know that it will destroy them. They are slaves to their nature and cannot override their instincts.

The great part is... they can't do a thing to you. They KNOW that they did it to themselves!

It can depend a great deal on where you live. If you're in the U.S., each state usually has their own "default" as to what happens with a divorce. Some states consider all property "common" to both people in the marriage, in which case he couldn't take everything unless that's what he puts in the divorce agreement, and you sign it.

I'd suggest first going to your state's government website (or the equivalent if you're from another country, the same is true for Canada's provinces, for example) and search "divorce". You'll get much more specific information there.

I hope so.

Aside from the fact that I resent people who leech off the system , men have been burned in divorce for so long I just love to hear when the woman has to pay.

I don't know what state you live in, but see an atty. My bet is that if it's your stuff and your kids and your house -- he can leave with the shirt on his back and that will be it. If he has a job and is capable of making money -- there's noway a judge will force you to pay spousal maintenance for him. Most women don't get that anymore.

It depends case to case so you should talk to a lawyer that you can talk your particular case with.