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Is this a good symbolism poem?
I'm new at this and i suck...but this is a mixture of early modern english( or middle english) and today's modern english
Thou art beautiful in forms
never seen anything likest
thy face awakens my soul
my blood runs white through my veins
comest to me and i shall be thy moon
so you can be thy sword
I willest walk thy great wall of china just to be with you
first line: you are so beautiful
second line: my eye's have never seen anything like you
third line: your face is so beautiful my soul smiles
fourth line: i am pure ( virgin)
fifth line: come to me and i shall be your light
sixth line: and you shall be my protector, man, strenght etc
seventh line: i'll walk eternity to be with you ( the great wall of china is very very long!!)
i know it don't make since and these are my translations and what it means to me if they are wrong. thanks for reading
4 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
It is a beautiful poem considering that you are new... you surely dont suck
but its not symbolism..you are just using different words for something and the reader immediately knows what they refer to.
though "my blood runs white through my veins..." now this is good symbolism
for understanding symbolism better, read some dan brown books specially the da vinci code
best of luck!!
- ?Lv 71 decade ago
Beautiful. It is hard to get into the Old English writing. I have trouble with the word 'likest'. That word doesn't sound right and actually is the only one that I question. The rest sounds very nice and I like that you break it down into our everyday English.
