losing "the one" i love...hanging one or letting go?

Here is the long story:I dated this guy John for two times:once in 2008 and once in 2009-2010.We were best friends until our recent break up. The dating in 2008 was for 4 months and in 2009-Feb 2010 was 6 months.Yet somehow I fell in love with him and vice versa. He was there for me when I was dealing with my 4 yr relationship fiasco and saw me cry and laugh and was there for me at midnight to help me with essays.The guy that I dated for almost 4 yrs and I called it off in June 2009.After that I started dating John shortly.Everything was okay but then I became sick and pregnant with his child which I did not tell him,my ex helped me when I had a miscariage since my ex of 4 yrs and I were best friends and still are,John thought I was cheating on him so he went and slept with this girl for 3 times when I was not there for him for 3 weeks(dealing with finding out I was 6 weeks pregnant) when his uncle passed away and he had a small accident(found all this stuff out when he was drunk). I was not there for him but the girl he met he had a connection with because even months later I found out that they were texting when he was not letting me check the time on his Karma(cell phone) and was paranoid when I kissed him in front of his sister,etc. Anyhow in Feb I sort of had enough because my grades were going down the drain and I had a nervous break down.He never knew abt the miscariage I had which sort of left me depressed, I went to our mutual friend in tears and said that I could not take it anymore and that I was thinking abt breaking up with him.She was meeting up with him the very same day to get a book back from him and before I could tell her do not say anything to him because I need to talk with him he calls and we break up.I saw him 1 week later,gave him a bracelet he gave me,a 20 page letter and we exchanged apologies.After that I hit rock bottom,I could not study for 2 weeks,lost 10 lbs, cried myself to sleep and it was really bad.I finally pulled myself together and started making A's and B's.5-6 weeks later I ran into him when at the same bar he goes to while with friends.We ignored each other as though we had no idea who we were which broke my heart and my guyfriend I was with was playing with my ex's emotions by giving me a kiss on the cheek.

Soon after my friend and I went to the same bar again to celebrate our good grades etc and have a girls night out and I step outside,he is abt to leave. I call after him,ask him if he would like to join me for coffee or catch up and he said no then vents off for at least 20 minutes. I listened to everything he had to say abt the break up and his life:his dad having lung cancer and losing his job,school(grad),work,helping his familye,etc. He kissed me then proposed which I at first was a joke but then realized he was serious so I accepted.In the past he proposed but I turned him down because life was always chaotic and now life for me was good. I was introduced to his father as his fiance and his father gave us his blessing, we talked that night until 3 am as though nothing happened and he kept telling me how much he loves me,he gave me back the bracelet I gave him after the break up and saw that the letter I gave him he had and a bracelet from 2008 he still possessed. In the morning he had to run errands a few hrs later I receive a call from him wanting to talk with me abt how we rushed into things last night and how he wants to be friends.I agreed. We called each other the following days especially him.So we were on terms of friends,I called him a couple of times to wish him Happy Good Friday and Happy Easter and just see how he is doing etc but he was not in a talkative mood. Anyhow I found out that he went after my best friend 6 weeks after the break up,he converted to islam then asked her how she felt abt him which well she did not feel the same way as he did:she saw him as a friend. He then asked my friend(best friend) which is also a mutual friend abt her friend Joy and how she feels abt him.I just found this out recently.Also one of my good friends started dating one of his friends(who does not like him yet hangs out in the same group of ppl because of his sister-ex's).So Thursday of this week I hung out with my friend, her date(ex's friend who does not like him), and a couple of good friends of the ex's.Okay all of my ex's friends see me as the biatch or devil or something.So I was myself and cordial and had conversations and was polite.After some of the friends left this one friend oif my ex's well he starts to hit on me and we start talking.So I am thinking "This is so not good..I cannot date his friend"..Plus last week I met this other guy while celebrating my friend's 22nd b-day and we hit it off instantly right away..I still think am in love with my ex but have not spoken with him ever since Easter.I am not sure if it is worth waiting for him or if it is okay to hang out with his friends as my friend