how do i apologize to this girl without sounding like i'm just doing it for myself? i'm really sorry?

Take full responsibility for the offense, without sharing the blame with anyone else, and without presenting mitigating circumstances. Admit that you were wrong emphatically, unreservedly, and immediately. An incomplete apology often feels more like an insult. An apology with an excuse is simply not an apology. It may very well be that other people or circumstances contributed to the situation, but you cannot apologize for them; you can only apologize for yourself, so leave them out of it.3Realize that there are no excuses. Do not try to think of or offer one. An apology with an excuse is not an apology. Take full responsibility for what you did. And if the person to whom you apologize rejects it, then they do not deserve it, but do not take it back; still say "I'm sorry Decide when to apologize. Sometimes immediately after your mistake is best, sometimes not. The sting of a harsh word can be cooled right away with a quick apology, but other offenses might need the other person to cool down before they are willing to even listen to your next sentence. However, the sooner you apologize for your mistake, the more likely it will be viewed as an error in judgment and not a character flaw.5 "I'm sorry; I shouldn't have said that."Write your apology down. Construct a letter to the person you're apologizing to, rehearsing what you will say in person. If you don't feel comfortable with writing, then use a voice recorder. Not only will this help you remember what to say when you're face to face with them, but you can also bring the copy with you and hand it to them if you find the apology quite difficult to express. But never forget that a direct and honest apology is best. Do it face to face, if possible. A phoned, emailed or recorded apology may show a lack of sincerity and effort.Begin the apology by naming the offense and the feelings it may have caused. Be specific about the incident so that they know exactly what you're apologizing for. Make it a point to avoid using the word "but". ("I am sorry, but..." means "I am not sorry.") Also, do not say "I'm sorry you feel that way" or "I'm sorry if you were offended." Be sorry for what you did! "I'm sorry you feel that way" makes it seem like you are blaming the other person, and is not a real apology. Validate their feelings or discomfort by acknowledging your transgression's (potential) effects, while taking responsiblity:Make amends. Think about what caused you to make the offense. Is it because you're a little too laid back about being on time, or remembering important dates? Is it because you tend to react instantly to certain comments, without pausing to consider an alternative point of view? Is it because you are unhappy with your life, and you unknowingly take it out on others? Find the underlying problem, describe it to the person (as an explanation, not an excuse), and tell them what you intend to do to rectify that problem so that you can avoid this mistake in the future: Express your appreciation for the role that they play in your life, emphasizing that you do not want to jeopardize or damage the relationship. This is the time to briefly recount what has created and sustained the bond over time and tell loved ones that they are indeed loved. Describe what your life would be missing without their trust and their company.9Ask if they will give you another chance to make up for what you did wrong. Tell them you'd love to show them that you've learned from your mistake, and that you will take action to change and grow as a result, if they will let you. Make a clear request for forgiveness and wait for their answer. This gives the injured party the well deserved "power" in determining the outcome of the situation.10Be patient. If an apology is not accepted, thank them for hearing you out and leave the door open for if they wish to reconcile later. (E.g. "I understand you're still upset about it, but thanks for giving me the chance to apologize. If you ever change your mind, please give me a call.") Sometimes people want to forgive you, but they still need a little time to cool off. If you are lucky enough for your apology to be accepted:

Avoid the temptation to throw in a few excuses at the end. Instead, have a transition planned out beforehand for what you can do to solidify the clean slate (e.g. "Let's go get some coffee and catch up. It'll be my treat. I miss knowing what you're up to.").

Remember, just because someone accepts your apology doesn't mean they've fully forgiven you. It can take time, maybe a long time, before the injured party can completely let go and fully trust you again. There is little you can do to speed this process up, but there are endless ways to bog it down. If the person is truly important to you, it's worth it to give them the time and space they need to heal. Don't expect them to go right back to acting normally immediately.

At the same time, don't let someone hang this over your head for the rest of your life. The same

Well, it's obvious that you know you've done wrong and are genuinely sorry, and it's fine to tell her how sorry you are, but doing it face to face most likely wouldn't be the best course of action right now because her feeling threatened by you.

You may want to consider leaving her a note of apology, telling her that you recognize your mistake and that althought you pushed it too far, you really don't mean her any harm. Aknowledge that you know very well the depth of the situation now, but at the time were intoxicated beyond moral reason.

If you do decide to pull her aside instead of writing her, don't do it somewhere where there's no people or she may think you're going to try all that again. Physical contact is out of the question because you've already invaded a very personal space of hers and she needs to feel comfortable around you.

Explaining to her how sorry you are and that though there's no way to take back what you did, you could offer to make it up to her.

If she still wants to shun you, she has the right and you should just leave her alone or she may consider pressing charges.

I wish you good luck and consider not drinking at social gatherings for a while, atleast until you've straitened all that out.

Best of luck. :)

I know your heart is breaking and I am sorry. I have been there and I know it hurts. It has been my personal experience that occasionally a man will do a complete turn around with a new partner and be the perfect mate even though he dogged out his previous girl. The excuses he gave you were valid but I know it doesn't make it hurt any less.

Well first of all I just want to say that you sound like a complete gentleman who wants to set things straight. I like the sound of that! If you have her number by any chance and she has yours, text her saying that you're really sorry and you wouldn't do that if you were sober. If you don't have her number, don't try to find it and text her otherwise she'd just think that you're more of a creep. I honestly believe that the most straightforward and most quickest way is to apologize to her face to face. Even though she may not want to look at you, just let her know firmly that what you did was wrong and that you'd never do that if you were sober. Apologize over and over if you want, just to emphasize the meaning of your apology. :p Good luck.

Well there's really nothing you can do here to make anything better. Drunk or not, that was all you. The best you could do is give her a sober apology and its up to her to forgive you.

email/text her

if u dont know her email/phone number

im sure u have mutual friends