Looking for advice after verbally abusive past?

I'm 17 years old and have had a verbally abusive past. My father was/is always putting me down, calling me names, cussing at me, making every little tiny decision for me, saying he doesn't "give a D@^^N about me, my siblings, or my mom", saying I'm psychotic, withholding support (even with childhood-like things such as YMCA soccer and acting classes), among many other things.

On Saturday, he blew up at me out in public while we were shopping for a Mother's Day gift. I had things I wanted to get her already in mind. Last year I shopped by myself with no help, but this year he woke me up and said that we should go. I assumed he just wanted to spend time with me, but when we got to the stores, any little thing I had in mind wasn't good enough. He didn't like this idea, or didn't like that idea. I'd pick out flowers and he would put them down and get something else. When we were leaving the second store, I said quietly to him, because the cashiers were nearby, "This is turning into a husband-to-wife gift, rather than a Mother's Day gift from me." He started screaming and cussing at me right outside the store and threw the car keys about 40 feet down the sidewalk. He continued to insult me for about 45 minutes in the hot car (I live in Florida) with people watching. I told my mom later and she said that next time it happens I should just call 911. My dad hasn't spoken to me or anyone in the family since, and he hiding around the house to avoid being spoken to.

My mom occasionally puts me down and/or treats me as less than my other siblings. The most recent event was I was nervous about having a endoscopy done at the hospital. I was getting a little upset about it (nobody had told me what to expect yet, or what would happen), and she basically just told me to get over my fear of it and stop being such a baby.

Well, anyway, my mom is making me get a job this summer (my first job), but because of the verbal abuse, I have no self-confidence, low self-esteem, and low self-worth. I'm very nervous and worried about not doing my job right, forgetting to do something, people being rude, etc. It's becoming a paralyzing fear of getting a job. I've recently (in the past year or so) become very shy and nervous around people, so much that I don't go out with friends often. Last Thursday was the first time in almost two years that I met up with friends. I don't go to restaurants, sports events, fun things (movies, bowling, skating, etc.), friends houses, etc. because I'm so afraid of new situations. I occasionally even feel guilty for being alive. I have great difficulty making decisions (from big choices to small ones - even what to order at a restaurant with my family). I've tried talking to a counselor about my anxiety issues, but she wasn't much help. Plus, I'm too nervous/shy to even talk to someone personally about any of this.

Does anyone have any tips, words of encouragement, websites I should look into for advice, online counselors, advice, etc? It would be greatly appreciated. Sorry that this is so long.